I am Jack's Smirking Revenge

It was on the tip of every one's tongue. Tyler and I just gave it a name.

"I've seen Fight Club the strongest & smartest men who've ever lived....
....I see all this potential....
....& I see it squandered.

God damn it! An entire generation pumping gas & waiting tables. Slaves with white collars.
Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes...working jobs we hate...so we can buy shit we don't need.

We're the middle children of history...
no purpose or place...
We have no Great War...no Great Depression..
Our Great War is a spiritual war...Our Great Depression is our lives.

We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars...but we won't...and we're slowly realizing that fact...and we're very, very pissed off."

The first rule of Hating the Patriots is.....

Tyler Durden's soliloquy leaves us with only one concern....what is our homework assignment?

We must do our best to rile our faux-Patriot opponent by throwing more logs on to the fire of this burgeoning rivalry. We want you to start a fight:

• Go to the Boston Globe's Patriot Forum, get a user name, and begin to agitate.
• Go to the Patriot's Website Fan Forum, get a user name, and incite with all of the thunder & lightning you can muster.
• Go to Longboard's and demand that they stop pandering to New Englanders (They allow people to post all sorts of disparaging things about San Diego. Where do we live?)

You will do this and it will be the most liberating day of your life. You will appreciate everything more: while drinking your coffee you will actually take notice of the impending sunrise. You will be truly alive for the first time. Why? Because with impunity and no chance of retribution you will destroy the morale of Patriot fan. They are excited about their winning Redsox and their rebounding Patriots, and it is beautiful....you will destroy something beautiful with a wicked quickness.

What you will become is a troll....the most reviled thing someone can do while posting. It is jumping on to the opposition's site and, with purpose, derailing their conversation threads. Each will plea with fellow posters to ignore your comments.....but it simply cannot be done! They will not be able to resist any cheap shot at San Diego...and your objective will be achieved.

That is your homework, Patriot Haters. Charge after it....

The HATETHEPATRIOTS Legal Team Has Convened

Our legal team convened and has advised as follows:

Strike the Dolphin game from the record!

If not the official record then at least from your mind. We have no choice but to put it behind us or it will drive us mad and ruin the festivities for the upcoming nationally televised Charger/Patriot game. In looking for Silver Linings we have found the following:

• It's never easy to cross three time zones and win a game in the NFL (that's why the Patriots are just staying in Ca after the 49er game)
• We went across three time zones to Florida last year to play the Jag-ovs and were defeated quite handily yet turned it around following that game.
• There was a team in '94-'95 that began the season 2-3 but their loss in the 5th game was at home and they were crushed 40-8 (that San Francisco 49er team turned it around....unfortunately for the Chargers) so it could be worse.

Win our home games. Steal a couple on the road. Things will work out.

The Patriots are coming......the Patriots are coming.....and they're bringing a 3-1 record with them sans Zoolander (Thank God the Angels just won.......there's still hope!).

This game will have playoff implications, as we thought before the season began, only now it won't be for home field advantage......it'll be for a chance at the playoffs.

Yes....Jim Mora......WE SAID IT.... "Playoffs".


Get your mind off of this last loss by visiting "The Good Links" section in the sidebar. You will see a link for another blog: Zino's Top 10

Zino is a XX1090 Scott and BR listener who does a funny top ten list each week. Check out his blog where he posts the lists as well as the audio clip from the radio show. It took me awhile to find his blog because I was convinced that he spelled his name with an "E" (Zeno) like the philosopher. There are a couple of things I'll never forget from my first philosophy class, things I carry with me today. One thing being, my professor standing before his students readying for the day's lesson on paradoxes, specifically those of motion and the following phrase uttered:

"Zeno: A really neat guy"

Not very profound but memorable, for who describes a 2500 year old dead philosopher as neat? My cynical, atheist espousing college philosophy professor, that's who! Incidentally, I still recall the lesson based on that one curious phrase.....Anyway, check out ZINO's blog, and more importantly, click the audio link....you will laugh...promise! We can only hope, now, for a Patriot themed Top 10 list this week.

Also click the link in the sidebar for "Missing Rings" featuring the '81 Chargers. As a wee lad growing up in Chicago as a Bear fan I will tell you that the earliest game I can recall is.....the January 1982 Charger/Dolphin playoff game featuring the "Hook & Ladder" (there weren't too many Bear games of note prior to 1984 and my birth). They are airing the show on the NFL Network but if you would like to read about it and watch a clip with commentary about the Hook & Ladder, it's highly recommended.

The "Countdown" reads less than 7 Days.....The propaganda campaign will commence tomorrow.....

Mr. Durden IS building an army.....

"Raid-uh" Haters Respond:

We were encouraged to advertise one last piece for the organization that resides at:

666 Dysfunction Junction

Crusty Owner Speaks

We're glad that Al Davis is at the helm for the "Raiduhs". It ensures that the Chargers will continue to have an available doormat for the foreseeable future.

When you hire/fire this many coaches (Cable, Kiffen, Shell, Callahan, Gruden, Shanahan, et. al.) in such a short period of time you're probably doomed. Take a look at that picture......doomed.......that barely passes for alive....IS HE EVEN ALIVE?

After having listened to the retarded rantings of a has been owner like Al Davis....well let's just say I NOW feel even better about having offered to shave my head if the Raiders beat us on December 4th. Have a look at a quality owner in action:




"Lane Kiffin is a flat out li-uhh" ---AL DAVIS

The answer to your question is YES. Al Davis is a "MASSHOLE".

The Hand of God

Forget everything we preached about God being TOO busy for sporting events! God was at the Charger/Raider game and it has been confirmed....HE's a Bolt Backer!

Was there ever any doubt?

Lightning comes from the heavens.....

Raiders are degenerate scum who belong in a confessional....

It's a No Brainer! God was at the Oakland Coliseum Just like HE was at the '86 World Cup helping Maradona and Argentina defeat England (check out the World Cup coverage futbol fans). It had to be God in '86.....that little bastard's 5'3"tall......there's NO way he got up and hit that ball.....it was the hand of GOD! God revealed himself again on September 28th, 2008 A.D.



The 1st Act of God: HE mysteriously appeared and helped Marques Harris sack and strip Jamarcus Russell (a.k.a.-Fat Raider QB), and then inexplicably recover a fumble while laying on his back and Raiders piling on top of him. GOD, folks!

The 2nd Act of God: A play that simply has not been talked about but was SO critical. We'll call it "The Heel Tap From God". Right before the Raiders tied it up at 18 a piece late in the game they had an opportunity to actually push ahead with a TD. We saw Jamarcus Russell fire to an open zone at the goal line.....but nobody was there and it ricocheted incomplete. But then the replay....Zack Miller who had torched us earlier for a 63 yd TD on a go route was going across the middle uncovered and inexplicably tripped, unable to recover. The Raiders settled for a FG and the rest was history. GOD, folks!

This game was ripe with INEXPLICABLYness....umhum...

We'll never doubt his omniscience again. Foolish on our part, really. After all, the most famous play in the history of the NFL might very well be.....wait for it (sorry, I'm getting ready to watch Barney Stinson in H.I.M.Y.M)......"THE IMMACULATE RECEPTION".......against who else but the Raiders!. With a moniker like that we know GOD, not to be a Raider! (enjoy the footage)



We hate to harp on Antonio Cromartie but the guy is so whiny and he gets flagged WAY more than Jammer did a few years back......speaking of Jammer.....HE'S THE MAN! What a huge hit he made to break up that pass play in the 4th.

The Return of Stephen Cooper.....GOD is a Charger Fan!

Also Check out the logo for our Anti-Patriot themed T-shirt that will be on-sale during the Charger/Patriot game on October 12th---Actually you had no choice....It's huge!

Signs, Signs, Everywhere The Signs

Outside of the occasional wedding attended, this Avenger, has spent very little time in a church over the last fifteen years. I cannot speak for the others, but I am not particularly religious. Including this morning I have attended mass, precisely two times, in the previous time frame mentioned. In visiting a sanctuary, where at least everyone else believes in higher powers than self to be at work, it becomes a necessity to wonder and question whether or not there are omens involved in this life. Whether or not my experience this morning at "Baby Avenger #2's" baptism was a sign, of sorts? A sign intended to ward off the EVIL that is....the Oakland Raiders?

Through the Sacrament of Baptism we are initiated into Christ's holy church. We are incorporated into God's mighty acts of salvation and given new birth through water and the spirit. All this is God's gift, offered to us without price.

In looking for signs we are brought to the symbol of water. It is the ultimate representation of life but also of renewal. There is a "born again" feeling of paddling out into the sea, nature's biggest wonder, just as there is a new sense of life after fasting and then drinking a tall glass of water. There is rejuvenation in acts such as those.

Bruce Lee advised: "Be like water! If you put water in a cup it becomes the cup. If you put water in a glass it becomes the glass. Water can flow and water can crash....Be like water my friend!" It is our life source no matter its state.

As it pertains to religion, a baptism is a rebirth into God's house, an initiation. No doubt, a powerful thing to witness, even if unsure of our place in this life and the sometimes horrible things we witness in the name of the world's various religions. Sorry........there were signs I was speaking of....

Why be looking for signs? I spoke of the other visit to church my family has made in the last fifteen years and it too was for a Baptism, for "Baby Avenger #1". The date of that covenant was January 14th, 2007. Does that date ring a bell?

That was the day the New England Patriot hatred was born. Into our house they came for a Divisional Playoff game and ended our season of high hopes. I have wrote about how the Ethos of that organization died that day when they behaved as though they had never won a big game in their lives. There are those who say, "Boo-Hoo, LT! Cry Baby!", but for me, I'm with LT. The Patriots, in my eyes, died that day, and the seeds of HATETHEPATRIOTS were sown.

I vividly recall Reverend Jim mentioning the Chargers at the end of his sermon, asking for victory and a good game on January 14th, 2007. And today? Well there was no mention of football at all and I realized that the omen had been found. Asking God for help in a football game is about as frivolous as it comes. Pray for safety but no more....God has other things on his plate.

I would say that the season of renewal began last Monday night and today--September 28th--In the 2008th year of our lord----it shall continue. I will take some water, not in the name of God, but in the name of life and all other pieces of symbolism that water represents and I will douse my San Diego Chargers hat...... for the sign appeared to me at 11:00 am. In not asking assistance from the heavens, like we did against the Patriots, we shall be victorious in Oakland today.

Be like water...my friends.

Mr. Moss...Muggin for the Man

Moss.....WE REPEAT.....has not been arrested AGAIN for hitting a meter maid, like he did in 2002.

THIS MUGSHOT IS OLD NEWS.

He could next be charged with murder, though. Murder of a *Dynasty*! Will Moss continue the downward spiral that is his life? Hey, every one's happy when you're 16-0 and Zoolander is throwin' you passes. What about when a no namer (Scott Casell) fails to look your way?

Here are some observations from the Boston Globe following last week's "Bashing in the 'borough"....the "Rape at the Razor"....the......well, feel free to add your own moniker for the "Dolphin Debacle" of last week.

The above link is to a report card grade on the Patriot WRs which is Hilarious! Below, Dan Shaughnessy reports on Randy Moss' behavior during Dolphin game. We'll provide an excerpt for those of you who cannot adequately budget in the time to HATE the PATRIOTS:

THIS wasn't supposed to happen by Dan Shaughnessy

"There was another juicy subplot. As the Dolphins padded their lead, Randy Moss started to appear downright disinterested. Moss sat by himself at the end of the bench for a good portion of the time New England's offense was on the sideline. We worried Moss might go all Manny Ramirez on us."

"I don't really pay attention to that," said Cassel when asked about Moss's isolation pattern on the bench. "I didn't even notice the fact that he was anywhere other than on the bench."

Moss said all the right things after the game and would not be baited into any controversy.

"Next question," said the all-world wideout in response to a query about "adjusting" to a new quarterback (the brief exchange between Moss and a reporter did not appear on the official transcript released by the Patriots)

....Randy Moss being equated to Manny Ramirez! Not good. For those not in the loop, Manny Ramirez is the new age Benedict Arnold....traitor to the Red Sox cause...a complete "sand baggin' son of a bitch"....who incidentally will be a lot richer for it once he becomes a free agent at seasons end. MUERTE, lOS DODGERS, TAMBIEN!

Can't wait to see what Randy does next.

Will the team get dragged down with him?