"Wag of the Finger" RT's Longboard Grill "Tip of the Hat" Rocky's Crown Pub

In this segment, I would like to give a nod to one of the last great anchormen of our generation, Mr. Stephen Colbert. His genious has given us "The Word", "Better know a District", and most noteworthy of all, "Tip of the Hat/Wag of the Finger". Our purpose here will be to shed light on the great San Diego bars that are truly SAN DIEGAN (i.e. Charger/Padre) but also to "put on notice" those filthy establishments that cow tow to an eastern element, specifically a New England element. This is San Diego and we should not be subjected to the migratory patterns of the Northeastern Moron while trying to have a beer and watch a game. The proprietors of these establishments should be put on notice....

Without further adieu:

A "Tip of the Hat" to Rocky's Crown Pub located at 3786 Ingraham St. in Pacific Beach.
Everyone in San Diego knows that a quality burger will always be had at Rocky's but I didn't know how provincial they were until I received a fantastic text message yesterday. I was notified by a Charger/Padre fan that while seated at the bar, service was refused to his pal until he removed the ball cap he was wearing. Now this wasn't a mere matter of etiquette while dining but rather a nod to Rocky's loyal customers....Rocky's loyal SAN DIEGAN customers! The kid was wearing a Boston Red Sox hat, which we all know is tantamount to wearing a New England Patriots hat, so off it came before service could be rendered!

Now I'm sure you're thinking (besides...boy I need to hurry over to Rocky's!), what was a Charger/Padre fan doing with a kid wearing a Red Sox hat? Your concern is valid and you can be sure that my brother will be getting a stern talking to!!!!

So to Rocky's management and staff....Here's a tip of the hat to you!!!

And now for our "Wag of the Finger" (in addition to the one my brother will be receiving for fraternizing with the enemy):

RT's Longboard Grill on Garnet Ave. in Pacific Beach. I always loved "Longboards" and went there often back in the late '90s when it opened but had heard that recently it was a New England Bar. I found this difficult to believe but received confirmation and I have vowed to never go there again (unless it is to chant 18-1...18-1...18-1....actually... I might just be going there)! Rather than wax poetic about my disdain for this establishment I'll go ahead and just post the "Longboards" myspace page....you'll never be so disgusted in your life.....(scroll down and look to the right)....

http://www.myspace.com/longboardgrill

RT's Longboard Grill.....You've received our inaugural "Wag of the Finger". RT---you're on notice!

If you have any other Tips/Wags please post and share with your community....we all must know...

Zoolander or "Giselle's errand boy"

"Giselle's errand boy " brought to you by an enthusiastic Patriot/Tom hater from Chicago, IL. Thanks Elle!

I like Zoolander....you be the judge.

Evolution

My hate has evolved. As written earlier, I noted how the Patriots actually seemed to be an organization that did things "right". That notion began to disintegrate though as I watched the Patriots talk so much trash in the '06-'07 playoffs, the sort of trash they had previously condemned.

My hate was galvanized however when the SPYGATE story broke and it looked as though the "Genius" and "Zoolander" (creator of illegitimate children) might actually be frauds and worthy of Super Bowl Asterisks. My cause was also furthered when that piece of crap Moss actually began trying to play football because now he was "happy" and he was finally playing with a "great QB".
Moss: "Peyton Manning has his great receivers, why can't Tom Brady?"

A playoff loss, Ex-Raider piece of crap Moss, Ex-Charger douche bags like Harrison (HGH suspension) and Seau (lame retirement speech), Belechick arrogance, and finally SPYGATE would be enough to put any reasonable person over the edge in their hatred towards the Patriots. Just when I thought this though, the biggest strike against the Pats came thundering down...

We went to Foxboro for the 9/16/07 Charger game.....and met the morons who live there. That experience right there trumps any item off my laundry list of hate. They are the biggest clowns and will remain the impetus for my hate long after the likes of Belechick and the male model Brady have gone. All of these morons are part and parcel to "Red Sox Nation" as well, thus the dire need for an opposition party.....The Anti-Patriot League!

Any group, that is a part of the strange paradox that vocalizes homophobia at every turn yet also maintains the most bizarre man love towards Tom Brady (a.k.a. Zoolander) and how they each wish they had his life, must be opposed by any and all means necessary.

Oppose the invasion of "Red Sox Nation" into your baseball city and their accompaniment of "Sweet Caroline" singing "retahhhds". Don't sell your tickets to them!

Oppose by blacklisting any local bar that encourages patronage from any New England sports fan.

Oppose by actively hating the New England Patriots and their elitist sports writers and fan base.

Start your own chapter of The-Anti Patriot league!

...by any means necessary!

What is the center of the field for?

The center of the field is where players congratulate each other after a 3 hour battle. It is also where opposing players gather to pray that they made it through the day safely.

It is not where you gather to mock your opponent when they are offering congratulations.

If done on the sideline to taunt fans I probably would have laughed.

NE Moron Fan response to LT is typical because...well they're morons!

Remember....Remember... Middle Of Our Field-JANUARY 14th, 2007

Genesis 1:1

There is a starting point for any fan's hatred towards another sports team. It
could be a traditional team rivalry, an unlikeable player, hate passed on from
father to son or for the simple reason that you're just tired of seeing that
"no good" team win. Pure hatred, however,is best cultivated under the following
condition: a high degree of respect for a team followed by a monumental "let
down"....a team losing the moral fiber you thought it formerly possessed.

After the Chargers were knocked out of the playoffs in January 2007 I
e-mailed the following rant to as many people as I could. This is GENESIS 1:1

1/15/07
To whom it may concern:
 
For the past five years I have fully supported the New England Patriots and
the success they have earned during that course of time. When the ignorant
masses spoke ill of the Patriots, I was quick to remind them that the
Patriots were everything that was good about professional football: the rare
case where individual achievement was subjugated for the advancement of the
"TEAM". This ideal of "team" has yielded three Superbowl championships and I
have enjoyed supporting the high ideal that the Patriots stood for.
 
After watching the Chargers/Patriots playoff game on Sunday I must say
that I am withdrawing my west-coast support and marking that franchise for
death!
 
Indeed, death is a strong statement so I would be remiss if I did not make
a few clarifications:

1. The Chargers were the more talented team.
2. The Patriots were the more level headed team.
3. The Patriots deserved to win--undoubtedly!
4. The biggest "hand" in the Patriot Victory was Troy Brown (literally and 
figuratively) and I can at   least take solace in knowing that the ultimate 
"team" guy made such a critical play to win the game.
5. The Patriots acted like it was their first time ever winning a big game
and acted like clowns in our back yard.

The Chargers are currently in possession of the classiest player in the
NFL--LaDainian Tomlinson. Not only is he the classiest---he's the best! I
support L.T. and his disapproval of the Patriot Franchise. I can clearly
see that the very ethos that propelled the Patriots to 3 championships is
DEAD. This was more than evident when they chose to dance like clowns in the
center of Jack Murphy Field and stomp on our lightning bolt and then proceed
to disrespect our players. Until that moment the Patriots had always "acted
like they had been there before."
 
Next week, join me in cheering FOR the Patriots so they can ultimately be
stomped by the Bears (like Superbowl XX) or the Saints (Yea Brees!). West
coast support has officially been withdrawn for your elitist franchise and
you now draw the full wrath of my being (For those who know me---think New
York Yankees).
 
In addition to stating my position on that deplorable franchise I would
like to rally the faithful to Join me in Foxborough, Massachusetts next season
so that we can bear witness to the San Diego Chargers avenging this---this
winter of our discontent. As of right now, a date has not been set, but we
are definitely playing in Mass. next season. Join me, where we will drink
far too much, yet maintain our dignity and represent San Diego well.
 
In addition to renouncing my support for the Patriots I am also terminating
my membership in Red Sox Nation. I now hate the Red Sox on par with the New
York Yankees (let's be honest and call a spade a spade...If the Yankees are
the "Evil Empire" the Red Sox are really only a couple of steps behind.... 
the Red Sox are "Mini-Me" to the Yanks "Dr. Evil".
 
I hope my position has been clarified on the things I hate most in the
WORLD:
 
1. New England Patriots
2. New York Yankees
3. Boston Red Sox
4. Terrorism
5. People who don't return their grocery shopping carts to their proper
areas
 
Numbers four and five are a little off topic but I feel it necessary to
finish lists in a top five format.
 
Please respond and join my cause. Direct the negative energy in your lives
to the classless organization in the New England region of our fine country. 
Join me there next fall and don your powder blue!!!!!
 
Sincerely
 

Enormously disgruntled Charger and Padre fan---cultivator of Patriot hatred.

1/16/07
Dear Mr.(redacted),
 
I can appreciate how upset and sick to your stomach you must be, I have
been in your shoes on many occasion given my loyalty to Boston Sports. I
will agree with you on several of your points and at the same time
admire your disdain for an entire city based on the events that transpired in San Diego. 
 
Yes, the Chargers have more talented players. The Patriots are a better TEAM. 
Yes, the Chargers should have won. The Patriots did win. 
 
1.) As far as the Patriots acting like clowns...give me a break. Go tell
Merriman that going on National TV the week before and basically saying
the "Jets" were the better team does not help. Be prepared to get your
faced rubbed in the dirt then when you lose and don't DO ANYTHING...  
 
2.) Not to mention the same dirt bag who was talking smack all week
DIDN'T DO ANYTHING during the game. Way to go. How many Pats talked
trash...none. 
 
3.) Lastly, this cheating dirt bag should not even have been playing
given the FACT that he was suspended for steroid used during the season.
 
 
4.) Apparently its "wrong" to celebrate when winning against the best
team in the league on the road being heavy underdogs. 
 
5.) LT Classy?????  Calling out Belichick??  Lt was a like the spoiled
little rich kid that didn't get his way and went home to cry and tell
his parents. "It was wrong for them do the dance that Merriman is known
for..." Are you kidding me...is this football or American Idol...how
about not dancing...GO HOME SHUT UP...STOP CRYING...Take your MVP and
watch the game with Marty you LOSER. 
 
6.) Oh yah...Merriman getting "lights out" carved in his hair...What
year is this?? 88..89?..Is Kid N'Play the Half time show?? 
 
7.) Phillips....Your ALL-PRO DE..."last year when we stomped them 47-17
we didn't celebrate and gave them compliments etc..." BLAH BLAH
BLAH....Maybe you didn't celebrate because it was the regular season you
loser..a regular season that saw your JOKE of an organization go nowhere once again...Deja Vu... 
 
Did the game not work out your way San Diego....TOO BAD....that's
life..Get another coach and get some "Football Players," not circus
clowns. FYI...Don't ever talk about plans for a parade before the
Superbowl win, that's both stupid and classless. You can make your trip
to Foxborough next year....and watch the game but the last time I checked it
wasn't for a trip to the AFC Championship game or even to the
playoffs...but do what you must. And yes...Root for the Bears..They will
be an easier game than New Orleans anyway for whatever team comes out of
the AFC...not to mention that is where your loyalty should be anyway. 
 
As far as the Red Sox being the MINI-ME or the Dr.Evil to the
Yankees...Simple as this...We are not San Diego, a joke organization, we
want to compete. Competing in the AL East means being 30 plus games over
.500..not winning the division being 88-74...To win in the AL East you
must Spend $$$..
 
(redacted), I admire your hatred...trust me if anyone can its me. I have
rooted for the death of many players over the years and have carried
meaningless grudges for decades. The bottom line is that the Chargers
and their fans should take a page out of the Patriots playbook.... Don't
talk trash, don't plan parades, don't get stupid hair cuts, and Don't
CRY LIKE LITTLE GIRLS when the better TEAM wins. Once San Diego and for
that matter the rest of the league gets what the Patriots do, WIN LIKE A
TEAM...not play like individuals then you will be better off. 
 
Todd 
(Boston) 
 
P.S. - Can you really root for Peyton Manning??  
 

1/16/07
Mr. Lewis,

I have disintegrated a chair and now feel up to the challenge of debating
you point by point. The open letter was cathartic for me but in my haste I
failed to mention another motivation, which set me over the edge. The
Union Tribune had a guest columnist in our Monday newspaper, a gentlemen
who's name eludes me right now, but he was with the Boston Herald
(For those who want to conjure hatred of the purest form locate said article
and read....you will proceed to form a militia so that you can burn Boston to
the ground). This gentleman disparaged our team and city
and then used direct quotes from "that idiot" Rosy Colvin to bolster
his arguments (The same Rosy Colvin who was a part of
the 2001 Bears team that choked to death in the playoffs then gravy
trained a Patriots Championship in 2003, finally earning one in 2004).

Colvin's main point of contention was how our city had a rally for the
Chargers during the previous week's build-up. God Forbid!! The city had
a rally to support its team; a team that they thought had the moxy to go
the distance. God forbid! The last I checked, there were no SD players sending
out chain-mails so that people would attend "A High School pep rally", as
that idiot Colvin referred to it. The city of San Diego had a genuine excitement
for its team much like the Boston supporters always do. The major difference
between the two cities is that when two servings of utter devastation is heaped
on to our plate we can rebound by going surfing the next day. New Englanders
are confined to winters of "What could have been?"

Allow me to retort to myself.... I’m going Surfing and I will also think about
"what could have been”. I am a fan, die-hard, much like the New Englanders!
The inferiority complex that they carried for close to a century has become my
burden but make no mistake.... while I may pray for the Patriot Charter to
plummet furiously into Lake Michigan next weekend I would never, in good
conscience, behave the way they did during the 1999 playoff loss to the Yankees,
when seeing their season come to an abrupt end, they chose to litter their
own field in protest. No! I have class! On to my rebuttal, Mr. Lewis.

1. I think Merriman misspoke. The Pats were winning against the Jets
at half so why would he declare how the Jets would win easily? I find
it comical that a three time Superbowl Champ would need bulletin
board material for motivation...then again the 2006 Pats are a shell
of the former championship era so maybe Ellis Hobbs needs the added
inspiration (Yea that's the guy who was called out by Phillip Rivers as the
weakest corner in the NFL during the little three ring circus at the end of
the game). I think that Merriman was discombobulated and misspoke
during the halftime show or it was the Maryland state education...your choice.

2. ALL PLAYERS TALK TRASH!! Larry Bird!!! C'mon, you
can do better than that!

3. On point three you clearly take umbrage with the
NFL Collective Bargaining Agreement. He served his four game
sentence it's the beauty of the NFL's legal system. You don't see me
complaining about Irving Fryar and how he was allowed to play again
after his problems with coke!

4. It's RIGHT to celebrate! It's not right to taunt when you can empathize
with what a losing team is going through. It has become tradition to cross
the field and shake hands with those who have vanquished your team so
we can logically deduce that if you are taunting in the middle of the field
it will ultimately be in the face of the M.V.P..:LaDainian Tomlinson.
Poor etiquette...I seem to recall buttoning my lip when Desmond Howard
torched the Pats back in 1996 so as not to incite the ginger fury coursing
through your veins.

5. LT is classy and if you observed the feud between Belichick and Manghini
this season you would agree that Belichick lacks class. Or how he absolutely
forearm shivered that photographer as he ran to the center of the field last
week after the Jets game. Not to mention when he signed a contract with
the Jets only to bail on them the next day and join the Pats. I guess the west
coast definition of class is not the same.

6. Carving something in your hair is very 88-89 and it is all the more embarrassing
when it is a self-imposed nickname. I concede...

7. Clearly your point here is that you shouldn't taunt during the regular
season but once the "one and done" format arrives it's o.k. Very flimsy counselor.

8. As for this parade non-sense, I really don't know where you are getting
your information (idiot from the Herald) No parade was planned because we
had not won a Superbowl. That's called"Yellow-Journalism"...Herald idiot is
distorting the real story to cast a better light on the Patriots.

I can and will get over this loss. My point was never sour grapes it was merely
the disappointment in seeing a rare ideal shattered at the end of the game that
upset me and required me to withdraw my west coast support for your organizations.

Do you even need my support? Perhaps not. You have won three of the last five
Superbowls. You completed the greatest comeback in sports history and destroyed the
psyche of your archenemy. Do you need good karma sent from me across the
country? If you say no....then let me say this:

I curse your teams! I curse them in the name of Jack Murphy that our
discontent will be avenged and that a stepping-stone will be in Foxboro next
fall (we must come during the regular season because the risk would be too
great that we will have home-field advantage next season).

San Diego teams will begin their dominion of man during the year of our lord-2007!

Sincerely
Jack Murphy's Avengers

These emails made the rounds and went back and forth for some time. From this point 
out they were signed...Jack Murphy's Avengers.These emails were the seeds.

Misquoted

I have come to find out that I "misremembered" the exact quote and that it actually should have read, "I hate the Patriots as much as genocide!"

That correction might seem unimportant but there is a clear distinction between each. To say that you hate the Patriots more than genocide would be a bit of a stretch and in poor taste but to say that you hate the Patriots AS MUCH AS genocide is quite reasonable and keeps with the requirements of this blog:common sense and reason.

I apologize to the person (brother) that uttered the memorable line. If it has caused you any grief don't drink so much next time.

Sierra Nevada Yes/Samuel Adams No

An overheard comment

I gathered with some people for a BBQ over the weekend and prior to the Rampage Jackson v Forrest Griffin fight that night, I heard the following words spoken, "The Patriots are worse than genocide!"

What could drive a person to make such a callous and obviously hyperbolic remark? Clearly the Patriots inspire a deep rooted hatred that lies deep within the human element...a hatred that has the capability of producing an incendiary and horribly offensive remark such as the one heard right before Griffin decisioned Jackson (What a great fight! Thanks for the money Tim.)

I won't even try to equate the Pats with genocide as that would just be wrong. I will say the following, however:

"I hate the Patriots more than the New York Yankees (and a few other things that I will discuss later)!"

Anyone who knows me will attest that the hatred is alive, strong, and overflowing if the NY Yankees have been surpassed.

As I look towards October 12th, 2008 I am compelled to stoke the embers of this fire.

Seau Sucks