2009 Rankings: Retro and Alternate Uniforms.....as well as my nomination

As I logged out of my email I was directed to Fox Sports where a gallery of this year's retro uniforms was displayed along with commentary. As always, the Chargers' powder blues were lauded.

But the idiot writing the captions felt that he couldn't give the nod to the Bolts' attire on grounds that he never sees them wear the Throwback White version. A little research would have told him that the Chargers will be wearing the whites against Kansas City next week. He also couldn't vault the Chargers to #1 because.....well that spot is reserved for the New England Patriots. "Simply the best" read the commentary----well they are simple. Red, White, and Blue and a bent over Patriot stamped onto the helmet. I thought the NFL was supposed to be family oriented?

Speaking of uniforms; the ones from the Lingerie Football League, while not retro, are definitely appealing. The Ghost of Sid Going astutely pointed out that we may be watching the wrong team in San Diego and if things go poorly this coming Monday Night.....well here's the LFL's schedule for San Diego's team, The Seduction.

Chasing the Chicken Man's 70 on a Northbound Train and that Son of a Punter

I had to take a break and while I have some pressing issues related to the plummeting Padres I must recap a couple of things first:

---Seeing the Padres on the road
---The kid who blew the U.S. Open

6/14/2009
I will begin with the train ride up to Orange County a week ago Sunday where The Ghost of Sid Going and I saw the Padres willingly submit to a weekend of domination by The The Angels Angels of Anaheim. The game sucked. It was another complete joke of a game where the little border town team looked very minor league. Chris Young completely sh*t the bed.......couldn't find the strike zone..... and when it was all said and done the board read 6-0 with CY headed to the DL.

Chris Young is incredibly frustrating....he is much like leaving the comfort of San Diego to watch the Padres play on foreign turf. I am now 0-5 lifetime.....two 6-0 losses on Sunday afternoon games to the Angels and Dodgers and the woeful sweep in NY last season at the hands of the Yanks. That being said: the fans were really nice, the stadium clean, and the lasting tribute to Nick Adenhart was touching.

When you willingly decide to follow around a AAAA team I suggest the following:

1. Expect that you will lose and it will BE ugly
   
2. Search out an ancillary storyline

Number one was achieved once again quite easily and for number two.......enter The Wade Boggs Effect. I had mentioned the drinking prowess of Wade Boggs prior to setting off for Anaheim and while The Ghost and I pushed the pace early (10:05 am-11:24 am) we fell dismally short of hitting the Magic 70. It was not to be on this given Sunday, however we quickly discovered the joy of taking the train to see a ball game and would like to give kudos to the designer of my Jansport backpack as it seems to have been engineered precisely for the purpose of transporting an 18-pack whilst still in the box.

'Twas good fun and I look forward to 2012 (?) when MLB's infinitely wise inter-league rotation deals us back into the AL West......why would we play a team every year that's but an hour train ride from San Diego? Anyways, I recommend the train for a good time as well as chasing after the Chicken Man and his Magic 70.

6/21/2009
I'm not a big golf guy but I do have a rooting interest in Phil Mickelson so this last Sunday I began my Father's Day by turning on the Open coverage at about 8 am where I caught an interview with then leader Ricky Barnes.

The viewer received all of the necessary Barnes background information: from LA, great Amateur player, high expectations but no results, athletic family......the son of a former NFL Punter:

Yes his father was a punter and he did his ball striking for none other than the New England Patriots. While this Patriot football talk was annoying to listen to as was the flashing of the ol' time football card (crappy facsimile--best I could do) it all became worth while at the end of the interview when Ricky Barnes simultaneously gave me a Happy Father's Day shout-out and a giant middle finger to Patriot Fan when he uttered one of my favorite phrases.......Go Chargers!

Suck it Patriot Fan! (although I can now see that I have opened myself up for ridicule as Barnes ended up choking horrifically down the stretch a la The 2006 edition of the San Diego Chargers who folded against the Patriots......but you can STILL suck it Patriot Fan!)

Go Chargers!

Who's watching, watching....?

…The 2009 Padres?
(Editor's Note: As reported to the AIC by one member of the Collective)
With much fan-fare but low expectations, the Pads took the field for opening week led by hometown hero Adrian Gonzales and returning ace Jake Peavy (but for how long?). Following an opening day loss, the fellas rallied to a series push against our division rival: the LA Cholos…err, Dodgers. The boys then followed it up with a sweep of the San Francisco baseball Giants to finish opening week not only with a winning record, but atop the competitive NL West (Editor's Note: competitive??? Competitive=euphemism for mediocre?).

I had the opportunity and the pleasure to attend Saturday night’s game, and what a game it was. (actually I had the opportunity to go to 4 games this week, but even with the 5 dollar meal-deal, 4 games is too much for this rank-and-file avenger to handle…waiting for Uncle Sam to subsidize my entertainment needs! Baseball’s too big to Fail!...but I digress…). Needless to say, it was definitely in the top 4 Padres games I’ve ever been to, which read as follows, in descending order:

• 4- 1999 “Meet the Mrs.... get kicked out” (falling from 1 to 4 due to the course of history)
• 3- 2006 “JD Drew eviscerated by the AIC” (he’s much better than Doug Mirabelli you know)
• 2- 2009 “Read the Blog to find out why” (check out my balls)
• 1- 2006 “Seats on the 1st base wall/Irish fan heckles the Ump”
  

(Editor's Note: Who the fuck does things in a "Top 4" format? JD Drew and Doug Mirabelli are useless cunts and deserved the lashing they received. I'm glad that I factor in to two of your top 4 life experiences......it could have been 3/4 if you had invited me on Saturday.....thanks Dick!)

Saturday’s game was a fast-paced one, taking only a little over 2 hours to complete, but it had a little bit of everything:

• Great pitching (8 2/3 from Jake)
• Clutch hitting (a rarity in San Diego)
• Some great defensive plays by Hairston and Giles-aka Jake the Mus…(keep yer hands in yer pockets Brian) (Editor's note: An excellent reference to Once Were Warriors: Go to You Tube)
  
• Three home runs including 2 by Senor Blanco
• A Win...most important of all.
  

The overriding factor that made this my all-time #2 Padres game though was not any of the above aspects of the game, nor was it the fact that the tickets were a gift from a friend, not even finding free parking on the street.....it was this ‘lil guy....

From having no balls to one.....you gotta start somewhere

.....who somehow found his way from Jake’s hand, rifled off the bat of third basemen Pablo Sandoval, rocketed over our heads, caromed off of a railing and into my outstretched hand. What a thrill! I felt like I was 12 again! Not even finding the free parking was a better feeling! Baseball’s back, and I’ll be back to see it live to be sure, let’s hope the Pads can keep on exceeding expectations. See ya at the park!

The Mad Italian (aka: The Ghost of Sid Going)
“Taller than Joe Morris, Dirtier than McConkey’s Mustache”

You'll shoot your leg off, Plax!!!

awwwww....Fuuuuuuuudge!

An icicle fell off the team bus and speared me in the leg!!

No it is not a gun shot wound, it is an icicle wound...and my name is Harris Smith.

The sad thing is that I’m not even surprised anymore when the latest news breaks regarding another “Professional” football player having had a scrape with the law. Plaxico now joins a long list of not-so-distinguished players who have disgraced themselves and their sport. He, Michael Vick, Pacman, Chris Henry and the like “sacrifice the gift” when they act like they're central characters in the mid '90s East Coast/West Coast rap feuds (Tupac's like eight bullets up on you, Plax). These antics cast aside the blessing which so many of us wish we had received and we resent you for it.

You Bitches don't know what bein' hard is...except Pacman...he always in da strip club...

Sure this Avenger suffers from excessive testosterone production, and has been known to engage in a bit of the ol’ “how’s yer father?”, occasionally resulting in expulsion from some of the West’s finer establishments...

But certainly not when the opportunity of a lifetime (the only viable livelihood for many of these players) and millions of dollars are on the line! Besides, there’s quite a big difference between a rugby-pitch donnybrook, and shooting the bouncer, (or yo’ dumb-ass self), at a nightclub.

What I’d like for Christmas is for the NFL to step in and enforce some real discipline on these players. There’s no way an average citizen is going to bring an unregistered weapon into an NYC club and get away with a slap on the wrist....and hopefully Plax won’t, but if he does, the NFL should have the balls to lay down the law and show players that playing in the league is a priviledge, not a right.

Bitch I got fired for bein' detrimental and shit...then the Bungles hired me back. You don't know shit.

There are plenty of high-caliber athletes out there ready to step up and take the place of these miscreants, the NFL should give them a chance and not tarnish its image by employing people of low character...

My agent got it all worked out...I'll be runnin' routes for the G-Men before long

THE GHOST OF SID GOING
(aka-Walter G. Bumpus)

The State of The 'HTP' Blog

It has been fairly quiet on the commenting front so when a solid one comes and it's from a frequent contributor, we must acknowledge. This came from The Ghost of Sid Going (presumably his ghost would still have solid 70s mutton chop side burns).

Massholian caffinator??? Looks like the big-fella could use a lil support. Where to begin? The transition in our country from neo-conservatism to neo-socialism? The lack of control the people have over our government? The lack of availability of the NFL network? The ridiculous crock of shite known as the BCS? Or perhaps the ever improving graphics on hatethepatriots.blogspot.com? Yes, that's right, as our team's chances fade further into into the fog, the AIC has seen fit to assuage our angst with a feast for the visual senses. Thank you Babaganoosh! Now we have two things to hope for this season: 9-7, and more of the lovely Ms. Alba! Blog on, my good man, blog on!

-The Ghost of Sid Going

Here at the blog there are a couple of things that we absolutely love: one of them is All Black rugby, and while we cannot deliver on a Charger season of 9-7 we can pay tribute to one of the great #9s of all time...



For a more comprehensive tribute to Sid Going, Click here.

...and the other thing we absolutely love? Per the request of The Ghost of Sid Going...

Enjoy, Ghost....