Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The Mope Is On The Block


Nearly 60 % of Bronco fans want Cutler to hit the skids and just shy of 10% could give two shits.

We're here to say that we voted, "don't care", but in the end, all that matters is what Bronco Owner Pat Bowlen thinks.....

"Numerous attempts to contact Jay Cutler in the last 10 days, both by head coach Josh McDaniels and myself, have been unsuccessful," Bowlen said in a statement. "A conversation with his agent earlier today clearly communicated and confirmed to us that Jay no longer has any desire to play for the Denver Broncos. We will begin discussions with other teams in an effort to accommodate his request to be traded."
-From The Denver Post
3/31/09


This is one of those moments where the wise counsel of a father is indispensable. Young Jay can respectfully look Pa Cutler in the eye and intently listen as Father compels him with the back of his hand to , "SNAP THE FUCK OUT OF IT!!!"

Alas, father too, lacks the rationality that most sentient beings possess. That is bad for Cutler......here's to his shipment to Detroit along with the perfect accompanying soundtrack for him to listen to on his bus to nowhere (or Detroit).

Bowlen: Cutler is gone
[Denver Post-Mike Klis]

Comments any one? Post 'em if you got 'em! We're disappointed that McJayGate is going away. Cutler is righteous drama.

In other sporting news:
A young woman danced with the stars...

Monday, March 30, 2009

Quote of the Week...and the week only just started

“I feel great, and I look amazing,”
Merriman said last week.


What a great quote!
A brutally honest self-assessment. We wonder if he cracked a sideways smirk as he said it? We can live with it either way as long as the bravado is accompanied with QB pressure.....Cromartie won't survive this season without it.

Chargers to gather Monday for start of official conditioning
[San Diego Union Tribune-Kevin Acee]

Sunday, March 29, 2009

This Is The End: March 29th extremely weak Round-up

“At the end of the day, I want to win,” Moorad says. “I won't rest until the Padres win a World Series ... I think you can win even in a smaller to medium-sized market (like San Diego) with a smaller to medium-sized payroll. We just have to be better and smarter than our competition.”
-Jeffrey Moorad (new Padres CEO and eventual owner)

With our 4th or 5th starters yet to be named and an untested bullpen we find ourselves apprehensive. As March comes to a close the Padres still lack any kind of speed and have power so dubious that the reasonable man must take stock and note that the prospects for the 2009 season are disheartening. There is reason for hope, though.

Spring is a time of renewal and, as such, also a symbol of hope. All you should really need though is the above quote to instill that glimmer of hope. Note the words that new Padre CEO Jeff Moorad chooses: never does he say that he is "looking to remain competitive in the NL West" or that "there's no reason that we can't be competitive". Those are the refrains of a previous regime...Jeff Moorad says he wants a World Series and he won't rest until the Padres get one. We like the sound of that. We recommend reading the remainder of the UT article to get a feel for why "the times they-are-a-changin'".

Modest start preceded Moorad's rise

[San Diego Union Tribune-Mark Zeigler]

However, if you still cannot muster some positive vision for the short term that's O.K. too.......complain away! As a Padre fan you've earned the right. You were told to vote "Yes" back in 1998 and the future would forever be bright. But it's 2009 and the "Bark Park" novelty has worn off to the casual fan so we're left with the same old cost cutting measures of days gone past. With a $40 million dollar payroll we will trudge through a weak NL West and compete against a Dodger team that just paid Manny Ramirez over $20 million.......we need not do the math for you.
We were lied to so feel free to deliver your bellows of rage. Don't let guys on the radio tell you that you should only be extolling the favorables on account of a new ownership group easing into place and April just on the horizon. Be cynical. Be skeptical. It's the Padres 40 year anniversary...you've earned it.
We're hopeful though, and satisfied that Jeff Moorad is at the helm. Check out the following audio:perhaps it will quell your pessimism.

Jeffrey Moorad with Scott & BR
[XX1090--3/27/09]
Kevin Towers with Darren Smith
[XX1090--3/27/09]

There's another thing that is quite outstanding about Moorad....he received his law degree from..........wait for it........Villanova! The bracket was blown up today but it is on life support with the "Villanova in the finals" selection. It looks like a Michigan St/Villanova final will be needed. Go Nova!

The week has ended and we can all agree that life is Too Short to not envision a little hope on the horizon...


Editor's Note:
The bearded fella sitting next to Senator McCain is Jeff Moorad. Moorad claims that the Senator knows more about the Diamondbacks than most people in the Arizona front office which explains precisely two things:
  1. D-Backs's poor showing in 2008.
  2. McCain's inability to differentiate between the Sunni and Shia sects of Islam (keep your eye on the ball Mr. McCain)

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Reassuring Villanova Coach Jay Wright

Dear Jay Wright,
Relax.......my bracket is in tact but I've repudiated the Louisville pick...if, God forbid, Villanova cannot secure the 2009 NCAA Championship but I win my pool I will hold true to my word: that $45 will go to a Villanova endorsed charitable endeavor or the Wildcat booster program. I'm in it for the long haul.....my 'Nova Nation T-shirt should be arriving on Monday.

What!? This guy's bracket is only going to net us $45 bucks!
What an awesome game. Big East basketball is a battle and boy is it fun to watch.

Next Stop - Final Four; Villanova Defeats Pittsburgh, 78-76

March 28, 2009

BOSTON, Mass. (AP) - Scottie Reynolds made a half-court dash for the game-winning shot with 0.5 seconds left, leading Villanova over Pittsburgh 78-76 Saturday night and back to the Final Four for the first time since its shocking run to the 1985 championship.[Read On]


Friday, March 27, 2009

An open letter to 'Nova Nation



Now that I've annexed myself to the Villanova Nation and renounced my Louisville pick I have a couple bones of contention. As part of the family I shall now take this opportunity to opine:
  • Not enough Wildcat Cheerleader photos available to the general public. This must be addressed and as such a new member of The Nation I don't know if I can act as the ombudsmen on this one. The 'Nova website is hardly a viable option so I made due with what I scavenged...

4:05 pm Tip-off Saturday
I'm goin' with 'Nova...don't call me a Homer!

  • One of Villanova's most notable alums is Howie Long. I have long since forgiven his Raider-ness and his indelible charisma that some how made mullets acceptable to '80s youths...


  • ......as I said.......I can live with the aforementioned indiscretions (even the fact that he's a Native Masshole), but I must, at some point, draw a line in the sand and say,
"Enough is enough.
At the risk of Excommunication before even the most informal of Baptisms,
I make my stand here!
Influential Villanova alum, I say!
Your fine institution is being tarnished by Howie Long
and his........I can't even say it.......just watch...



.....by Howie Long and his dick-headed-ness!"

Seriously, if a guy started grilling me in the parking lot of a Costco with such condescension, there's no doubt he'd be getting the, "Fuck Off!", of his life......even if it WAS a giant of a man who attended Villanova University.....that's Villanova....my new team.

Yer bein' a dick, Howie. It's making me want to buy Ford or Dodge. Please stop this man and his commercial enterprises, honorable Villanova alumni......

Editor's Note:
Currently I am up by seven points on the Commander-in-Chief

Thursday, March 26, 2009

The Renunciation Of My 2009 NCAA Champion Pick: Go 'Nova!




I am no expert on college basketball but this is what I do know:
  • I needed Memphis to beat Missouri tonight.... but I was sure they were in for a long night when I saw the Mo. starting line-up: Three guard set- no player shorter than 6'5". That's all I needed to be certain that one of my Final Four picks was FUCT!
  • Duke is an absolute SHAM! Every year they rely so much on the three that the shooter's touch eventually wears off. They have no inside game at all and they play like castrated bulls because of it.....I bet Blue Devil fans wish it were 1992 and they had big man Cherokee Parks. What a Joke! Taking Villanova was the safest pick of my bracket.....and now they get a Pitt team they handled by 10pts during the regular season.
  • I also know that this guy.... .....,guard Greg Paulus should payback his scholarship for embarrassing Duke University so badly....dribbling off his knee, firing passes out of bounds, desperation fouls due to a lack of athleticism..... He is in fact the worse player in the United States.
.....and there is one more thing I know: This is how I say, "Go 'Nova!"


Go 'Nova!
Damn my Louisville selection over the Wildcats!

I pick 'Nova each and every year for a couple wins (dating back to the ill-fated busted bracket of 1995: Final Four pick of a Kerry Kittles led Villanova team...ouch! Curse Old Dominion!) and now I'm claiming 'Nova Nation as safe haven......they have now become the only team outside of San Diego that I support and I don't feel bad about saying it based on the loose kinship of Augustinian Friars and The San Diego Friars.......having rationalized my new found allegiance, I officially renounce my 2009 March Madness Bracket. If victorious I shall donate all proceeds to the Roman Catholic Church or a Villanova approved charity...

Bring It Home 'Brotherly Love'

Eagle Cheerleader is how I say, "Go 'Nova!".

Villanova must crush Duke tonight to keep my bracket viable...to begin eliminating all of these Jags who went straight Chalk with their picks.

So as I was reading an article about Jay Wright's contribution to the city university along with the 'Nova athletic department's infusion of cold cash I noticed the sidebar story placed in the philly.com website..........Philadelphia Eagle Cheerleading tryouts.

Once again, this is how I say, "Go 'Nova!".


Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Cholla Cable Comments on Craziness


I open up the UT and what do I see.....Cholla! I hear his righteous proclamations in my sleep and now I have to read his opinions in the Sports section....

“It's a crazy time in this division,” Oakland Raiders coach Cholla Cable said Tuesday at the NFL owners' meetings.

Its only crazy because of that kid up in Denver, and by "kid" I mean McDaniels....Cutler is the "Crybaby". Yea real crazy! The only thing crazier would be that lard ass QB in Oakland developing some game.

Nice. Real Nice Cholla! The least you could have done was get some Black Widows slapped on the side of that Silver n' Black helmet. You useless C@#T!

For more about Cholla and how consistent the Chargers are:

Chargers are a model of consistency in topsy-turvy AFC West
[SD Union Tribune-Kevin Acee]

There's some good stuff on Aztec ace Stephen Strasburg over at 619 Sports. Craig Elsten is calling for the head of DC area writer Thomas Boswell. The charge....Blasphemy!
[619 Sports]

Editor's Note:
Apologies for the randomness of the Cholla reference..there are a select few who will understand. To attain enlightenment the following may provide it for you....... but probably not.....funny none the less.


Monday, March 23, 2009

Ryan Leaf: Version 2K9


A little alcohol and millions in the bank....well, hell.....you'd be smiling like that too!

Ryan Leaf Used To Be Carried In The Arms of Cheerleaders
[Deadspin]

The 2009 April Amateur Draft looms........ aspirations of a game-changing defender falling to pick #16 permeate our Collective minds...... take a look at the following video to reclaim a feel for what it was like to pick #2 overall....it was eleven years ago, perhaps you had forgotten.


Sunday, March 22, 2009

This Is The End: March 22nd Round-up

"What, you don't think I know?!! My bracket would have been Fu#ked too!"

Purdue, Gonzaga and Duke eked out games on Saturday and the Bracket stayed a clean 8 for 8. There were only 5 chances for the bracket to score points today and after a 2 for 2 morning the afternoon saw extraordinarily close games with the Missouri, Michigan State and Louisville picks. It was excruciating to sit through the Spartans/Trojans game and watch the Louisville/Sienna score ticker in the upper corner of the TV....but when it was all said and done we went 5 for 8 on the day with a solid 13/16 Sweet Sixteen teams in play.....still only missing one Elite Eight-er (Mountaineers of W.Va).

This is the year where scores are high as people who are clueless tend to pick according to high seeds which equals a plus rate of success in '09. The Sweet Sixteen is almost perfectly seeded outside of #12 Arizona and #5 Purdue crashing the party. Obama edged us by 1 game in Round 2 but we still hold a 3 point lead on the Leader of the Free World.

President Obama's Bracket
[ESPN Tournament Challenge]

San Diego State had a big basketball week (women win and men advance to NIT Quarters against either Davidson or St. Mary's) and a shaky baseball week. State squandered a 15 strikeout performance by Stephen Strasburg on Friday but salvaged the series by getting the win today.
[619 Sports]

For those who hold out hope.....we bring you radio interviews with Postgame's Bob Scanlan, MLB Padre beat writer Corey Brock and GM Kevin Towers. This is your opportunity to say,

`"Hey, I stuck with 'em during the darkest days of '08 and '09!"


Listen up and get a read on the new names on the back of the Jerseys.
Bob Scanlan with John Kentera
[xx1090-The Coach 3/17]
Corey Brock with John Kentera
[xx1090-The Coach 3/17]
Kevin Towers with Darren Smith
[xx1090-Darren Smith 3/19]

The drive-time show fired Jordan and we kept eating pizza from Chicago on a bun. What's changed? There's a lot less screaming and the pizza is still good.
After line-up changes, it's Brown's Boring Bozos

[UT-Jay Posner 3/20]

We can't even win our own game on our own turf. Japan beats the US in WBC Semifinals.
Japan rips USA, rolls into WBC final
[Si.Com]

The Legend with the weaker arm gives his 2 cents.....we don't believe that John called Jay, "...a little bitch", but we're sure he thinks it.
Elway weighs in on Cutler Crisis
[Denver Post]

What better way to end your week than to take a gander at perhaps the greatest Top Ten List in the history of Top Ten Lists. If you know of a better compilation let us know.....if your place of business blocks YouTube, so sorry you'll have to wait...."Top Ten" found through SI.com's Extra Mustard.
[Sand & Cotton]

Since you can never have too much Bad Religion in one week....This is not Armageddon... only the week's End...

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Southern California thrashes Boston College

The opportunity to remind Boston fan that they just got smacked by a team from California will not be passed up...

USC-72

BC -55

Meanwhile, our bracket came crashing back to Earth...after a 14/16 showing on Thursday, Friday gave us a dismal 10/16 for a 24pt first round showing. That puts us in OUR usual 1st round 22-25pt range.

All Final Four teams are alive but three wayward Sweet Sixteens were dismissed.....curse you Seminoles and Owls.....and the early loss of an Elite Eight-er is a gut-buster! Damn Huggins led Mountaineers!

The FSU/Wisconsin game was fantastic as was the Sienna/Ohio St. 2OT thriller....Kid from Sienna had ice in his veins sinking 3-balls multiple times as the clock ticked down (The World's Ombudsmen says he picked Sienna into the Final Four.....We picked Louisville to win it all....Sienna versus Louisville tomorrow....There can only be one!).

As this goes to post, Villanova looked fantastic this morning and Memphis is mopping the floor with Maryland....so we've got that going for us.

Side-note:
In 'Bracket Wars', The Collective is up by 5 points on President Barack Obama.


Friday, March 20, 2009

Passion Overfloweth: More Patriot Hate E-Mail

Don't feel bad....you're not the only one who wants Bill Belichick dead! So does Sawyer and Pittsburgh Steelers Blog, One For The Other Thumb.

If you can stomach the fact that its author is reveling in two Super Bowl victories over the last four years we encourage you to check it out. Very in-depth commentary/analysis and ridiculously adept at Photo-Shop.
[One for the Other Thumb]

Here's another addition of Patriot Hate E-Mail. Our #1 critic has been conspicuously absent from my email in-box.......so here are some jousts from a few weeks back.

Tom's BC (a mutually agreed upon alias)
Jack Murphy's Avengers, LMFAO, they should ban that dump, it's never produced one winner. Look, I have no problem with jumping on a cause and getting passionate about it, but for fuck sakes man, your city needs to actually win something at least once every 25, 35 or 45 years??? San Diego is LOSERVILLE in sports, your pathetic fan base cannot even sellout the home opener or even a (LMFAO) ever so rare, playoff game. But don't worry, if the AFC West wasn't a completely fraudulant, crap division, your overrated, WHINYASS, PUNKASS team would have never made the playoffs u DBAG. [sic]

A.I.Chief : Your Friendly Blog Admin.
FYI-I actually can't control whether our teams win or lose. I'm also unable to control who shows up to games.
And while I can't argue that the AFC West was horribly shocking this year, you should really look in the mirror and accept an indisputable truth: In sixteen games the Chargers looked good precisely three times....two of those times were when they mopped the floor with AFC East teams....Front-Runner.

Of course you can't control whether your teams win or not or who shows up, Captain Obvious but that doesn't change the fact that SD is the 2cnd worst sports city in the US (MSN poll from 2008, look it up). Now your showing your typical Dolts sissy powder blue colors, you go be proud of that early regular season win, if that makes you feel all warm and cozy about your whiny, overrated Dolts. See, here's the difference between the Patriots and the Dolts, the Dolts get all worked up over wins like that and the Pats are only satisfied with winning Super Bowls. Dude, just compare HC's, Pats have BB, the single greatest footbal mind in the league and the BEST coach the in the NFL, ever. Show me another coach that's won 3 SB's in the salary cap era, I'll save you the work, there are none. Meanwhile the head Dolt is a NOOOOOORV, case closed. I will taunt you as long as you keep this pathetic site up you DBAG. [sic]

I see you're still using your same ol' material (2008 MSN Poll) to try and validate yourself while condemning SD. Why would someone need validation when their city's teams have been essentially dominating the sports landscape over the last eight years? Captain obvious says, "Yer a poser!". You jumped on the bandwagon late and in a sport obsessed city of Boston you have to try and one-up the other die-hards. I get it. Surprised though as I thought you would have taken a day off after your Celts dropped ANOTHER game to an LA team. You probably weren't aware of it though, because you are a poser. Oh yea that's right just a meaningless reg. season game. The Oct 12th meeting btwn. the Bolts and Cheats was meaningless, agreed, until.....you missed the playoffs by a margin of one game. The site's not going anywhere. It's astonishing how many people hate the Patriots and their fans. I met a lot of guys like you when I went to Foxborough. They talk extraordinarily tough but in the end its just talk.. "Fack you, you fackin' powdah blue wearin' quee-uhs. Yar Chah-juhs kan't hold the Pats' fackin' jawk-strap. Ahh Coach is a Gawd. Ahh QB is a Gawd. and Giselle is a Gawdess!? You ARE the personification of the Bahhston caricature. Keep it comin', Clown

Good times with hate banter. This is a relationship that needs special care and attention.


Do you remember what this Patriot cheerleader was fired for?

Thursday, March 19, 2009

My Bracket Versus President Obama's


Commander-In-Chief sez Carolina in '09-a
Unbearably close calls with both 'Nova and Memphis!!!

With the Wildcats meeting Louisville in my final and the Tigers in the F4 that would have destroyed my 2009 bracket. Survived and advanced......that's all you have to do. Just barely squeaked out the Western Kentucky game over Illinois--Hilltoppers tried to blow it--but they survived and advanced.

Finishing day one with 14 wins and 2 losses, I'm up two games on President Obama. I missed the Clemson/Michigan game by a nose and was really off with my Mississippi State choice over Washington. As far as the Michigan game goes, I stand by it....The Big Ten is junk. I thought that MSU was an undervalued 13 seed and the perfect storm was in place against a team from The Pac-Ten in the midst of a down conference year (see....anyone can talk out of their ass and make it believable! 14/16 on day one Whaddup!!?? Bring it on Barry!). On to day two...

Check out the following links below:

The first one is a site dedicated to the objective analysis of polling data to try and predict the outcomes of elections. The writer's name is Nate Silver and he also writes for Baseball Prospectus (see 619 Sports for a look at SABR-metrics on MLB network as analyzed by morons earlier this week). The FiveThirtyEight article is interesting (see: ridiculous) in that actual statistical regressions were performed on Obama's bracket.....were his picks kickbacks to those crucial states that got him elected? You be the judge.....

The Cherry Picker in Chief
Obama NCAA Bracket Suggests Bias Toward Schools From Swing States
[FiveThirtyEight.com]

The second link is obviously from YouTube. Watch Obama go step by step in filling out his bracket. I just think its funny that this was turned into a special...... and then after #44 announced his Carolina 2009 champion pick he proceeded to put them on blast for busting his bracket last year. That's funny.....and what's funnier you ask? Mike Krzyzewski's reaction.

Obama's Bracket Analysis with ESPN's Andy Katz
[YouTube]

In Defense of an NCAA Bracket Obsessed Citizenry

This is a response.......nay, a defense of one of the great traditions in sport. That of the March Madness Bracket sheet. A fine writer, at The Legend of Cecilio Guante, makes a compelling case for abandoning the endeavor altogether. In short, the Scribe argues that the bracket is a harlot whose yearly betrayals can mortally wound---time invested but love never returned by the Mistress Bracket.

I say that it is better to have Bracketed and Lost than to have never Bracketed at all....I'm here to argue on behalf of the masses.....that the Bracket may be a devilish seductress but it is one we should embrace. Lovers are never without fault...
Opening Argument: Nostalgia...

It is with the NCAA Bracket that lasting memories are created. Without a bracket filled would my March Memories be so rich, so vivid? I think not. I remember my first hunt...it was 1991, the year of UNLV's undefeated run to the final Four in defense of their 1990 Crown. They returned Larry Johnson, Anderson Hunt, Greg Anthony, Stacy Augmon and George Ackles and had every reason to repeat....but they fell to Duke. I remember UNLV's starting five but its not my lasting impression of that tourney.....I picked my first 12 seed versus 5 seed upset special when I chose Eastern Michigan to knock off Penn State. My competitors looked at me like I was clairvoyant....and you better believe I played up my revelatory skills.

There was 1992 when I took Kansas.... Adonis Jordan and company were toppled by the Miners of El Paso and my Bracket was Busted in Round Two. I'm still pained by the play of the Jayhawks but my true angst would not be cultivated until the Elite Eight when Kentucky met Duke. Kentucky's story was beautiful...kids who dreamt of being Wildcats so they dutifully sat through program probation until they were seniors.....and then, upon returning to the field of 64, had their souls crushed by a perfect from the field Christian Laettner. I had never followed Kentucky basketball and I was unbelievably devastated by what I had just watched. My hatred for Duke was born....

In 1993 I penciled the Fab 5 in as Champs and two important things happened with that bracket. I watched the Final Four in San Felipe, BC Mexico and it changed my life...now the epiphany is for another post but as you recall Webber made an illegal T.O. call, The Fab Five lost, and another in a long line of brackets was busted.....and, of course, a second team from Tobacco Road made my "Teams Whose charter I want to crash in the Andes so they will cannibalize each other" : List of Hate. Curse you Rick Fox and Donald Williams...

As the years passed on I could recount a unique anecdote from each tournament* but this post is for a cogent argument and in that vain I shall proceed.

The Remedy for a Hateful Heart....

I mentioned my disdain for both Duke and North Carolina, the perennially over exposed media darlings, who devastated me in both 1992 and 1993. Curious what a little time and the prospects of winning a pool can do for a broken heart. As 1998 rolled around I began to enjoy the play of Antawn Jamison, Vince Carter and Ed Cota.....and it didn't hurt that NC was the arch-rival to those dirty Blue Devils so to the Tarheel wagon I hitched my bracket dreams. Alas, their run ended in the Final Four but the lasting memory was NC's redemption in my eyes.......My antipathy for Tobacco Road's 'Heels ended, all because of a black and white photocopy scrawled in red ink.

The next piece of heeling that took place for me came in 2001.....the year I achieved (in my mind) bracket perfection. It could not happen without my submission to the Duke Blue Devils, without my forgiveness and acceptance of Shane Battier, Jayson Williams, and Michael Dunleavy Jr. They brought me to bracket immortality** and to this day I think back fondly on that Duke team. My heart was further cleansed of ACC abhorrence...

Your Alma Mater or Bracket Immortality?

This is a false choice for all those who debate the validity of choosing your mid-major Alma Mater over a Major Conference's at-large bid. Always choose your Alma Mater for at least one win! This provides you with solace in that you did not betray your school but also, if incorrect, will only cost you a point in the end. If victorious you look like a genius. Sometimes a point can be enough to cost you a pool victory but sometimes that's just the way it goes....what's Ten Bucks amongst friends? Most importantly though, your loyalty having been tested, you are free to attend your Alma Mater's homecoming.

Pool Tradition and Friendly Gatherings

Perhaps the most important aspect of NCAA Brackets is the sense of yearly tradition instilled. I've acted as a pool administrator for every year since 1992. The last ten pools have all been run out of the same location downtown and, that folks, is tradition. Each and every year the pool culminates with a viewing at a Gaslamp bar so the requisite posturing and trash talking can take place. Each year the winnings are divided up so that there is a little side pot for he/she who most closely predicts the championship game final score and this always ensures drama regardless of the actual competitiveness of the game. It also ensures that one and all will attend the bar viewing and in the end that's all that matters......because it is here that friends gather, friends who, as time passes, see each other all too infrequently. Can you think of a more sound argument than that of camaraderie as a reason for continuing your yearly pool? Search your feelings...

Bracket Purity: The Deer Hunter and His Single Bullet

There are those who fill out multiple brackets all with different winners and disseminate them across the continent. This ensures that they can brag about having picked this year's Valpariaso/Gonzaga/George Mason/Davidson/etc......this is folly and impurity on a grand scale. One Man--One Bracket. Therein lies the challenge. Can you rise to the occasion, choose one form, and stick with it? Like DeNiro's Deer Hunter, hunting with a single cartridge, I too hand in only One version of March Madness. It is my Madness and it is my yearly challenge.


One Shot
In the end it is your choice.....to forfeit $10 bucks.....to act as an expert on teams you've never heard of.....TO HAVE FUN! Brackets are much like golf....there is always room for improvement, mastery never attained. Except of course for this year....read it and weep, baby!

Louisville Memphis Villanova Oklahoma
Louisville Villanova

Louisville
!!!


*The 1997 tournament was the best ever. While attending school in Flagstaff Arizona we gathered at Chili's to watch the UofA try to knock off the defending Champion Kentucky Wildcats and to celebrate my good buddy's 21st birthday. Dollar-u-call-its when ever Arizona had the lead was the Bar's edict for the evening....it was a seesaw battle through regulation and into overtime......you never saw a group of guys run to the bar so quick to cash in on that buck drink...the Pitino tempo ensured that we were legless by night's end.....ahhhh College.
**On the 1-2-4-8-12-16 scoring scale I believe my final was 136 points. I still have the bracket and if I can find it quick enough I'll scan and post it. Beat that score!

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Donkeys Falling Apart at the Seams

On this glorious day (Yesterday-St. Patrick's Day) we have yet more to celebrate, so as you read, sit back and enjoy your favorite beverage in a San Diego sports team mug or cuzi.

Today in Donkey town it was 72 degrees, which tells me that San Diego weather was making an appearance and assisting in the demise of a team at a location they call Dove Valley (Donkey Headquarters.)

McJayGate as its being cleverly called

As you have heard, things have gone from bad to worse between Chokler and McDaniels here in Donkey town. Chokler, as expected did not make an appearance at the Broncos first meeting under McDaniels. He also has put his home up for sale along with his parents home here in Denver.

You and I inadvertantly thought that Chokler was an adult....an adult athlete that was mistakenly given a Pro Bowl invitation. Apparently we were incorrect bout his manhood as he seems to be attached at the hip to his family who, from recent local radio commentaries, make consistent appearances at little Jay's practices......as though he were still in Pop Warner.

With Chokler being treated as if he were a Pop Warner player, who is to blame him for his childish actions. We ought to give the shout out to Mr. CUTler for this wonderful upbringing.

What I find very interesting is the split between the fans here in Donkey Land. They are die hard through and through. Every car you see driving the streets has a sticker or more promoting their beloved Donkeys, but that's just the the half of it. They drape themselves in the orange and blue; the Post delivery man damn near wears his Donkey's hat everyday! This nucleus however has been split by the drama going on here with CUTler.

Half the folks feel as though they have a quarterback that is solid and are confident that he could be the future of the franchise, while the other half don't want the door to hit CUTler in the ass on his way out.

Today's discussion on the FAN was about McDaniels future. The question to all was, "How many wins must the Donkey's have for McDaniels to keep his job?" The comments were interesting. Firstly, statements were being made that, ".....should the Donkey's match the record of the Detroit Lions historic low from last year, McDonkys coaching career would be over. When it was all said and done the number turned out to be 3. Should the Donkey's post 3 or less wins in the 20009-10 season McDonkey will be out of a job. That would be sweet justice for this assistant Cheater turned Donkey.

So will Chris Simms be the Donkey slinger, or will they see the likes of McNabb or Delhomme? Only time will tell, but a source from McNabb's camp stated today that he was out on the Donkey's. Should he not play for Philly next year he would only be interested in playing for a contender, not a pretender.

I couldn't say it better myself. The Denver Pretenders.


Does this look like a leader of men?

Until another update from behind enemy lines...

May all things that are good shine down on our Chargers and Padres, as well as their growing rank of supporters.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Monday, March 16, 2009

Bleacher Bums, Karma, Reincarnation


The first incarnation of XX1090's Bleacher Bums (Earl & Jordan/Jordan & Earl), has passed on to another dimension.....one in which other cancelled programs like The Magic Hour and The Chevy Chase Show pollute the lives of an unsuspecting and alternate version of us....

Bleacher Bum Line-up numero dos = Ted Mendenhall, DI Earl and "The Hammer" Hal Brown....
Let us hope it is not a deuce...

We turned on the radio at 2:43 pm to hear Darren Smith say that "The Hammer" (program director) was holding a press conference at 3 pm. Good news came in the form of the charlatan carpetbagger Jordan being removed from XX1090. First question came from the UT's Jay Posner.....Hammer wasn't going to yield regarding his inclination to put untrained fans on air.... blah, blah, blah.....and so here we are.....

The show today was ten times better than it ever was in the previous 2 1/2 months. We got the impression that "The Hammer" is part of the line-up to lend his support for the concept. Within a few weeks however, it'll be Ted Mendenhall (a San Diego native) and DI Earl (the skeptical point of view) running the show. It was nice to be able to listen to the radio in peace and "choose" to alternate with XTRA 1360 rather than be "driven" to it out of rage.

We're willing to give Earl the benefit of the doubt for two reasons:
  1. He's not a complete dickhead like Jordan.
  2. His only option was failure when paired with a partner like Jordan....and that's "The Hammer's" fault.
Imagine you or We showing up in Philadelphia in 2005 and then being thrown on the radio as the voice of the fans. You or We proceed to tell Philly Fan that Donovan McNabb and Brian Dawkins have done absolutely nothing for the city. Forget the NFC Championship game appearances for who knows how many years in a row (see...we don't even know for sure because we haven't been in Philly long enough) and forget the Super Bowl appearance....it was a LOSS!!!! AHHHHHHH!!!! Donovan McNabb can't hold Tom Brady's Jock!!!!! Just keepin' it real Philadelphia!

How would that go over?

So now You or We move on to baseball where we proceed to tell Philly Fan that there is NOBODY who loves the Phillies more than We! We love 'em so much we shit maroon and that oddly tinted blue from their 1980's Uniforms each and every day!
Who cares that We can't name half of the roster from the 1980 World Series winner, which happened to be the only championship in the previous 126 years of the franchise.....of course until We got on the air and celebrated the 2008 win over that team from Tampa Bay.....

Would that ever happen? Would a San Diego fan showing up in Philadelphia ever get on the radio when he says things like, "bummer bra!", or "...can I get some Avocado on that?" .....Hell and No!!!!

(We never say 'bra'....we do love Avocado though)

Would a San Diegan get on the air after only 5 years of living there and not knowing any of the franchises' histories? Enough questions because all sentient beings know that it would NEVER happen!!!!

In summation: Today's drive time radio was improved. Chicago on a Bun's pizza is good so we'll accept the line-up change and quell boycott...for now. "The Hammer" F#$%ed up with Jordan....seeks redemption with Ted Mendenhall. Finally, we'd scrap the California Love Intro music and go with something a little more So-Cal...


Sunday, March 15, 2009

This Is The End: March 15th Round-up

This week was weird...

So LT is staying and the Chargers avoid having to take a RB in the 1st round....hopefully.

Bleacher Bums have on-air meltdown. We laugh, cringe and begin organizing boycotts. Enjoy the photo-shop by Blue in the upper right hand corner. That is your "Un-official" complaint link for the Bums. If they're on air tomorrow....Chicago On A Bun will see a lot more of these:

To whom it may concern:

I have long been a visitor to Di Crescenzos in Rancho Bernardo. Since the change in ownership (to Chicago on a Bun) I have continued to visit your store because, as someone who was born in Chicago, I find the food fantastic. Therefore it pains me to say that I will no longer be giving you my patronage due to your sponsorship of the Bleacher Bums on XX1090.

I am a SAN DIEGO sports fan. Not JUST a fan but a SAN DIEGO sports fan and that is an important distinction to make. I feel as though I am being berated by both Jordan and Earl for simply being from San Diego and following teams that unfortunately lack a winning tradition. As most San Diegans (including myself) are transplants to America's Finest City, I find no problem with the fact that Jordan and Earl hail from other parts of the country. Nor is it an issue that they are both critical of San Diego teams: All good fans should expect a lot of their teams and hold management accountable. I cringe but can live with their inaccurate dissemination of information because I do a fair amount of reading on my own. The issue at hand however, is simply a case of decency towards people who choose to call San Diego home. When someone chooses to go on the air and yell at San Diegans, proclaiming that we, "suck"......there will be repercussions.

Who will pay the price for the indiscretions of the Bleacher Bums? Because XX1090 believes that pawning off a defective product on its consumers is a sound business practice there is only one group to make accountable. I believe that Chicago on a Bun falls within the purview of that group: sponsorship.

My intention is to mobilize support for a boycott of your stores if you continue to run any type of sponsorship with XX1090 and the Bleacher Bums radio program. I will allow you to make the choice during these difficult economic times and this shall remain confidential until I receive word from you.

In the mean time I invite you to view the following link. There are only 44 comments but my software tells me that over 1800 people viewed the post....not one person felt inclined to leave a positive piece of feedback regarding the Bleacher Bums' program. Now if I actually made an effort to consolidate all of the dissatisfied XX1090 listeners, I can promise that you will feel the affects.

In the end this is your choice: do you feel that San Diegans are apathetic and will choose to sit pat or are you worried about the economic viability of your restaurant and your ability to continue to profit and provide employment?

Sincerely

A Concerned
San Diegan

If everyone follows suit with a committed effort to make sponsorship pay we should be free of this horrible broadcasting burden. The grassroots effort begins with you...
[Editor's Note: Chicago On A Bun owner, Steve Wolff, responded on March 24th]

Dear ****:

Sorry it took so long to answer your questions, but we have been busy behind the scenes with the 1090 management.

First let me tell you that we are also San Diego sports fans. I personally have had Chargers season tickets for the past 13 years (ever since I moved here). So I know exactly how you are feeling.

Second, understand that we have certain contractual obligations that we have to live up to. But having said that, we were very proactive in resolving the situation at the station. We had stopped going on the air with Jordan and Earl. For the past 3 weeks my brother, and co-owner of Chicago On A Bun, has only appeared with Darren Smith. We made our feelings known to management and ownership that the product (the Bleacher Bums) with which we were associating our name was substandard and at times offensive.

We believe we had something to do with what the station eventually did to resolve the situation. Hopefully with Hal and Earl together, the show will be more respectful to San Diego, its fans and ultimately to anyone who listens.

One other thing that is important, is that sponsoring a talk show does not mean we necessarily agree or disagree with what the hosts say. In most cases we believe the first amendment is sacred. However, we believe that the Bleacher Bums went over the line of decency and good taste and we agreed with a lot of what you were upset about and decided to do something about it. We hope you are satisfied that the show, and the attitude of the show, has changed.
Speaking of good taste we hope that you will come back to the good taste of our food at Chicago On A Bun.

If there is anything we can do for you, please let us know. Thank you for being a good customer and a passionate listener.

Sincerely,

Steve Wolff
Co-Owner
Chicago In A Bun

The power of the written word, indeed. Ken Rosenthall was spot on.

You all were apprised of the Holy Trinity Polling: Alba a close 2% second to Biel in Extra Mustard's Hottest Jessica Poll......the gap did not close. We refuse to believe you are apathetic so we'll applaud your taste in another fine Jessica named Biel.
[Here is where we link to ourself because its that good of a post]

SDSU has a great week in baseball sweeping UNLV. I get shut out of Friday Strasburg start when parking garage refuses to take my $20 bill....something about only accepting ones and fives. Alternative neighborhood street parking is also uncooperative.....no parking until 7pm....I drive home and listen to SS, K the first seven batters he faces. At least it was on the radio...
[619 Sports]

That is what you know....here's what you might not know:

Jay Cutler has gone crazy. He's selling house in Denver. Parents are selling house in Denver. The city of Denver is unhappy with boy and his bad haircut.
[Denver Post]

Former NFL RB, Travis Henry, is in prison for a coke bust, is flat broke, and owes child support.....for his nine kids....by nine different women. The next time your life gives you lemons...forget the lemonade and ponder the plight of Travis Henry.
[Denver Post]

The United States beat the Netherlands, 9-3, to stay alive in the World Baseball Classic. Played in Miami, 157 people watched it all unfold. What a terrible baseball city yet they have two World Series Championships.......ahhhh, the torture.
[SD-Union Tribune (AP)]

There's a lot of other stuff that happened too but as far as I'm concerned its the end of the week as we know it...


Saturday, March 14, 2009

SDSU Dominates The Friday Dojo

San Diego State's Men and Women advance in the Mountain West Conference basketball tournament and Stephen Strasburg strikes out 14 in the Aztecs' 4-3 win over UNLV.

For full report see:
[619 Sports]


Friday, March 13, 2009

One Half of Circus Fired?


Has one half of the circus been dismissed? According to a Gaslamp Ball secret source, Jordan/Jordan Downtown/JDT/Sideshow Bob/Raging Douche has been dismissed by XX1090.

Please God..........do not forsake us.......bestow upon us, your heavenly grace, in our time of need...


Bleacher Bum Jordan Fired!!!
[Gaslamp Ball]

The Stockholm Syndrome, Hal Brown's Clowns, and Making a Claim For San Diego

Hal Brown's Bleacher Clowns

Help unplug this decade's version of Ryan Leaf. Here in San Diego we have a distinct lineage of abject failures, ranging from the crybaby antics of Ryan Leaf ("Knock it off!") to the foolish proclamations of Matt Bush ("I'm Matt "Fucking" Bush....Fuck East County!"). They have embarrassed us both locally and nationally.

I sincerely doubt that the the Guy From New York and the Guy Who Claims Atlanta with the show named after Chicago Cubs Fans will ever make national headlines but that is no reason to accept any further abuse from XX1090's Program Director. It makes no economic sense to retain the clowns known as The Bleacher Bums. Sponsorship will soon attest to that.

For those suffering from Stockholm Syndrome, I say to you:

"Snap the fuck out of it!!!"

Just because it is cool to regularly hear your voice on the radio doesn't make it a good idea. We are ALL dumber for having been subjected to this program for the last 10 weeks.....including you, Mr. Regular caller. Break the shackles that bind you....you need not be a hostage anymore.

To those transplants who yearn to call in because it is a friendly environment and proceed to start every call with, "I'm a (insert stupid non-San Diego team name here) fan, and I love your show......".........

"You can go Fuck yourself!!!"


This is San Diego and shit like that doesn't fly elsewhere so it shouldn't fly here. Start supporting the place you live!

Here is the official XX 1090 Bleacher Bum Removal Petition: Click here.

There's 291 signatures and that ain't enough to remove these clowns by Monday so get after it fellow San Diegans. In the words of Joey Ramone:

"We want the airwaves....that's right, that's right..."


Bad Radio Can Be So Tiring...

Eagerly awaiting a photo-shop job by Blue Ballzed I keep going in and out of my e-mail box. This has been an all day affair. Now each time I log out, throughout the day, I see the same article on my MSN page:
Still got it: The Sexiest Women Over 40

The accompanying picture is that of 42 year old Salma Hayek.......she of the sexiest scene ever put on film........the year was 1996..........and thanks to YouTube.......we can enjoy......