4th and Long Hits 'Em Hard in a Special Comment

In Review: We've had the Quote of the year this week preceded by the Analogy of the year all on the heels of the Best cheerleader story of the year.

What better time than now for the Avenging Ombudsmen to give a special comment! His moniker may be 4th and Long but trust us when we say....he ain't punting...he's going after that Patriot Cheerleader and her grammatically challenged "special" fella--Animal Style!!!

(Look at those Characters)

Explain to me why it is a good idea.. to draw anything on anyone's face at all? What should this mean? Why do we do it? Methinks it a bit untoward in the first place. However, having been a victim of certain "I love *expletive*" scribblings myself, a long, long time ago in a galaxy far away, I can discern from both ends of the spectrum. At this juncture, I would like to point out the 3 "D's" of passing out drunk around people what likes make mischief.... DON'T DO DAT.... It is almost the charge of those good friends around you to remind you why being out of control wasted is... well, not a good idea. A sharpie is often a wonderful means of doing this.

(Say 'ello to my little fren')

Now, that all being said, I would also like to shine a light on a certain aspects of the boyfriend's disposition that, with the help of a good friend's perspective, irks me. It is the line, "I am a currently deployed US Marine." I would love to preface my next few statements with the fact that I deeply and truly appreciate our military and EVERYTHING they do and provide for us. The same as I respect our Fire and Police forces, for putting life and limb on the table in a poker game with death, so that we can sit back and play the penny slots with a nice free,8 oz, casino beer in hand. The next diatribe will be directed directly at this delightful dude.....

In this country you, just like anyone else, have the RIGHT to express your opinion. However, how dare you throw your profession in our faces! We, the teachers, healers, lawyers, football players,business people, valets,

(Valets are fuckin' crooks!!! Where are my Sunglasses?)

waiters, babysitters, dogwalkers, fathers, brothers, sisters, mothers and Union, local number 734, would love to state that we perform valuable services for our country too. We keep it going so you have something to come back to! In fact, our tax dollars are paying your salary and allowing you to sit around on leave and play cards, drink beers, and live an excuse free life which our freedom also provides you. We all fight for it in our own way and your profession is no more valuable or less valuable then our own. I have been taught to be humble in what I do, NOT to throw it in people's faces to make my point stick home further. "Hello I perform a valuable service for my country, please let me cut the line, get 10% off caramel macchiatos and thank me constantly for my sacrifice. By the way, I am a bus driver"

(So expensive...wish I could get it free)

This makes no sense what so ever. Have a gripe about your girlfriends mistreatment. Have a gripe so much in fact, that you ACTUALLY ask her to be held accountable for her actions instead of those around her. Maybe this will keep her out of hot water next time. Better yet, set an example for her. Show respect for your fellow Americans by not throwing what you are "doing for us" directly in our visages. Then maybe she will see what a stand up guy is meant to be doing and follow suit. Then maybe we will want to hear what you both have to say. This will keep you and your missy thinking ahead and hopefully out of therapy some years down the line. My prayers are with you.

That is all for now. Measure twice, cut once my friends....

"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut."
-Ernest Hemingway

-4th and Long