Vikings DE Jared Allen: Political Pundit or Celebrity Impersonator?

Since we're still in the political season....want to know what Vikings DE Jared Allen is thinking?

Oh you want to know...he's smart. Trust us. His analysis of the political climate will become dogma. His mathematical mind works at an exponential rate. What the hell are we talking about? Here's what Jared Allen was thinking:

Jared Allen Supported McCain

Jared Allen said today was a "sad day" because John McCain had lost the election. He's not a big fan of Barack Obama's proposals that would include a higher tax rate for the wealthiest Americans, raising the rate from 35 percent to more than 39 percent. "There’s nothing I can do about it now," Allen said. "Our paychecks will be cut in half. It is what it is. McCain, I still love you. We still love you in Arizona. Obama, you better do what you promised because, well, the whole country’s watching."

Once again, that was what Jared Allen was thinking....
....and here's what he wasn't thinking...

"If I keep moonlighting as the biker with the Village People I might get my fourth DUI...those guys party hard after gigs...really hard..."

Is it Allen's legal troubles that have him worried about a proposed tax hike by Barrack Obama? Don't worry...Jared Allen's making $21 million this year, he can afford legal counsel! Does that qualify as a "Sad Day" in this country....we mean "Year"?

We've all heard that Barack Obama is a social Marxist, a re-distributer of wealth (Jared Allen's wealth) and in all likelihood a future playmate of Hugo Chavez and one of the Castro brothers.... he is the illegitimate son of Marx and Engels...

Marx's desire for a revolutionary re-structuring of society
+
Engels' analysis of the appalling conditions of the working class

=
This guy (minus the beard)overthrowing our economic system through a 4 % tax increase for the uber wealthy and
re-distributing it to the dregs that don't even pay taxes?

A bit dramatic isn't it?

Our issue with Jared Allen isn't that he is complaining about his taxes going up by 4% during a time when the working man can barely afford to see him running around the Metrodome.

Our issue is not with his salary. Everyone is worth $21 million a year.

We don't even care that his Idaho State education failed to provide him with the skills necessary to differentiate between a 15% (35% to 50%) tax increase and a 4% tax increase.

We can live with all those things, even the extra coin he's picking up as a stand-in for the Village people....

But what we will not condone...what we will not turn away from and tolerate is....

Jared Allen's insistence on mimicking John Travolta and that ridiculous Stayin' Alive headband. We get that fashion trends arrive late to the interior of the country....places like Idaho, Kansas City and now Minnesota....and we get that those trends will stick around way past their shelf life...but the lag time is supposed to be at MOST 3 years....not 3 DECADES!

In a time where our economic downturn dictates that the average man be appalled at anyone who cried foul when they made $21 million for the year.....all we can think about is that stupid headband and retarded little sack dance....the barbed wire tattoo is solid though....

political speak=picture of Alba...we don't care how many times we use it...
love it or leave it

This story was originally brought to our attention by the Scott and BR show and we would like to give credit for keeping us abreast of this important news....unlike Jared Allen who didn't even consider giving credit to AJ Smith for thieving his signature phrase...
"It is, what it is".