Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Thinking Out Loud: Jedd Gyorko's rear end

Jedd Gyorko's a** is huge. But not in the good way that the ladies and baseball scouts like.

Justin Upton's a** is also huge. I imagine the ladies love his a**. Juston Upton's a** makes him run really fast. That's good for him. And the D-Backs.
 
You know how everyone always says Padres OF prospect Jaff Decker is a "bad body type"? If you had never actually seen Jaff Decker before and you put him next to Jedd Gyorko (who you had also never sen in person) you would bet all of your earthly possessions that Jedd Gyorko was Jaff Decker*. What I'm trying to say is that Jedd Gyorko is a thick dude. He's bottom heavy. But alas, he hits like a witch.

* I played this pretend game with myself during Spring Training 2012.

I'm not really talking about Gyorko's a** in this post but more about the additions and subtractions of speed within the Padres major league line-up. Yes I know that Jedd Gyorko's in Tucson. Permit me to wonder for a moment . . .


Yonder Alonso is slower than molasses and he will be at first base for the foreseeable future. But he does spray the gaps. Slow fella has a lot of doubles.

Yasmani Grandal is faster than his Cuban brother. This is not much of a compliment.

Carlos Quentin: Not a fast man. But this does not matter because he has pull power in the middle of the line-up and he could melt your face with laser beam eyes.

I've just listed three guys who are not fast runners in a line-up that requires speed because of park size.

I'm thinking out loud.

Cameron Maybin is fast and he received a contract extension. So he's the Padres' CF of the future. Let's hope he starts hitting.

Alexi Amarista and Everth Cabrera can both run and they're exciting. But I don't know where they fit. I guess we need August and September's ABs to figure that out.

Will Venable can run but his awkward hairline and Princeton education prevent him from being a long term solution in RF.

And what of Chase Headley? Jedd Gyorko's a** makes me think of Chase Headley which is why I began writing this post.

Chase Headley can hit but he can also run. He's not Vince Coleman but that's a good thing. We don't need Chase getting stuck under a tarp during the Padres next World Series appearance. And yes, I'm saying it: I think Chase Headley needs to be here for that mythical, fantastical, World Series I dream about at 4:38 AM on Tuesday mornings in July.

If Chase Headley is traded (along with his speed) then he will be replaced with a base-clogger in Jedd Gyorko. By all accounts Jedd Gyorko can flat out hit, but how adversely will his lack of speed impact what the Padres are trying to do in PETCO Park*?

*Are they really going to move in the fences? If they do I hope they are brown.

I guess we have a few more days to see if Chase's legs are taken out of the PETCO equation.

1 comment:

  1. What are we waiting for let's bring t this guy in shortstop keep Chase put Amarista and Wife beater Cabrera on 2nd... And kick some azzz

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