The Los Angeles Dodgers: Looking like a whore

As a former writer for the Wall Street Journal and the author of The Extra 2%, Jonah Keri's financial views on the game of baseball are always well worth the read. Keri wrote a great column at Grantland the other day about the financial direction of the Los Angeles Dodgers. With a Gazillion dollar television deal on the horizon Keri wonders, "When you throw every fiscal strategy of the past decade out the window are you crazy . . . or genius?"

It's an interesting read. Ultimately, Keri comes to a conclusion that I don't entirely agree with: that the Dodgers might actually be smart. But it's Keri's Fault! I used the facts he presented to draw my conclusion.


This is the part of Jonah Keri's column where I became giddy:

"The value of this franchise is represented in the price we paid — that doesn't go up or down with one or two players' salaries," said Mark Walter, the Dodgers' principal owner and chairman. Walter was then asked if the Dodgers have a spending ceiling. "Somewhere, I suppose," came his oblique reply. Then, the coup de grace. Someone asked Dodgers president and CEO Stan Kasten about the possibility of butting up against MLB's very punitive luxury tax. "Mark and Magic don't even ask me about that," he said of his bosses' instructions, or lack thereof.

 At first blush the idea that the Dodgers are now like the free-wheeling Yankees is a scary thought. But fear not. The Dodgers are like a rich housewife whose kids are now off at school. She has little to do with her time so she fills the void by shopping. She adds new shoes to an already filled closet of shoes yet she rarely finds the time to wear these expensive accoutrements. The truth is that none of this really matters because she looks like a whore in most of those shoes anyways.

That's the Los Angeles Dodgers in a nutshell: A rich whore spending money on tons of crap for one reason and one reason only . . . she can.

I say keep doing it. Keep paying arms, legs, and shoes for players over 30 you dirty whore of a baseball team!

Go read the article to see every move the Dodgers have made this summer. It's a list of crazy stupid. Which I endorse.

Deciphering a Darren Smith Conversation with Adrian Gonzalez, robot

Yesterday, Darren Smith of XX1090 spoke with Adrian Gonzalez -- native San Diegan and new first baseman for the Los Angeles Dodgers. The interview was insightful on varied levels.

As a dedicated listener to Darren's show, I always marvel at his capabilities as an interviewer. Darren provided a comfortable setting for Adrian to open up to his hometown of San Diego about his time in Boston, putting on the uniform of the enemy in LA, and persisting through the modern world as a robot.


DARREN SMITH: Adrian, as always, a pleasure. Thank you very much for a few minutes

ADRIAN GONZALEZ: Hey. Darren. How are. You. Doing.

Sci Fi Type Beep Cursor Digital Electronic Type Screen Monitor Loop Typing Science Fiction

DS: Have you got use to that yet? Adrian Gonzalez the first baseman for the LA Dodgers?

AG: Yeah. As much. As. You. Can get. Used. To. That's. For Sure. The minute I. Heard. I. Was. Traded. I'm. Used. To. It. As. An. Artificial. Life. Form. I have. The ability. To adapt. More Readily. than my human. Counterparts.

Sci Fi Robot Machine Movement Servo Motors Science Fiction

DS: I was gonna say, 'Hey, congratulations or I was gonna say 'Hey man, I'm sorry it didn't work out.' What do you say to somebody like yourself in this situation?

AG: No. Congratulations. I. Mean. You. Know. We didn't win. Like what. Was. Expected. Of us in. Boston. But. The. Fact. That I. Don't think you can. Say. It. Didn't turn out. Or work out. Again. I am. Showing my. Abilities. As a 21st century. Machine. To Adapt is my. Primary function. Artificial. Intelligence can. Do this. Have you. Seen. The Incredibles?

Sci Fi Beep Button Electronic Science Fiction

DS: When did you first start hearing about the rumors about the possibility and when did you think it was going to become a reality?

AG: Um. Yeah. I mean. Friday. Same thing as. You. Guys. As. Artificial Intelligence. I am not yet. Equipped. To analyze. Predictive models. I. Was surprised. As surprised. As. A. Robot Can. Be.

Sci Fi Computer Screen Readout Digital Display Loop Science Fiction

DS: How surprised are you when you hear this, especially at the tail end of the month of August?

AG: Yeah. No. It's. Definitely. Surprising. The. Day. Before. That. On. Thursday. I. Never would. Have thought. Of it. As I. Mentioned previously. Despite. My. Programming. I was. Surprised. By. Robot. Standards. Anyways.

Sci Fi Computer Screen Readout Digital Display Loop Science Fiction

DS: Could you describe what the experience was like in Boston? I know it's a tough thing to ask and it's a tough thing to answer in 60 seconds or so, but overall, what was the experience like playing for the Red Sox?

AG: It was. A great. Experience. The. Fans. Were. Awesome. The Atmosphere at the. Ball. Park. Playing on the. Road. The. Whole. Red Sox Nation. They were all. Incredible. But. As a. CV-1000 model. Artificial. Human. I don't perform well. At. The. Particular. Line of latitude. Where Boston. Resides. Look at my. History. I have been. The property of. Florida. Texas. And. San. Diego. My. Circuitry. Is best suited. For. Sustainability in. Southern climes. This is really just. Robot 101.

Science Fiction Beep Tube Distortion High 02

DS: Was there anything that you didn't like about it? Was there anything that really didn't seem like a good fit for you?

AG: No. I mean. Personally. I had a. Great. Time. I loved my. Teammates. Except for. Josh. Beckett. He put. Chicken grease. In. My. USB. And airports. Which drastically. Reduced my power. Capabilities. Ironically. The Dodgers acquired. Beckett. As well as a machine. With artificial. Intelligence. I am. Surprisingly. Adept at detecting. Irony. Humans make. Strange choices. When. Large. Amounts. Of. Money. Are at. Their disposal.

 

laughing alien hyenas

DS: Did you take a good look at yourself in that Dodger uniform and what did you think when you put on that Dodger blue?

AG: Oh man. I was so. Excited. Of course. This is a contrived. Response. Written by my. Programmer. While I am in. A. Constant. State. Of evolution. Emotion is still. Very. Difficult. To grasp.

Sci Fi Alarm Device Warning Beeps Science Fiction

DS: Is it weird in any capacity that you do grow up in this area, knowing what the Dodgers mean to this fan base, was that at all bizarre for you, whatsoever, to think about that?

AG: Well I. Mean. You know. It's. We. Uh. Grow. Up. As. A. Fan. And. But. When you get. Into. This business. And you. Play. The. Game. You realize that. The thing that. Matters. Is. Playing to. Win . . . Again. This is. A Difficult question. The circuitry sequencing. In. My. Power Cortex. Does not. Discern. Geographic irregularities. As long. As. Weather. Patterns. Remain constant.

Sci Fi Type Beep Cursor Digital Electronic Type Screen Monitor Loop Typing Science Fiction

DS: When you were a kid (robot) though, growing up here as a Padre fan, what did you think about the Dodgers?

AG: Fernando.Valenzuela. Played. For. The Dodgers. So you always. Follow Fernando. And you. Know. It's the Padres' rival. So. It's. Always. Exciting. While I was. Very. Young. When. Fernandomania. Was. At it's peak. My. Advanced. Processing. Capabilities. Allowed. Me. To understand what. Many humans. Refer to. As. A Phenomenon. My search capabilities. Also indicate. That. Fernando. Played. For. The. Padres. During the. 95-96. Seasons. Padres fans. Should. Love. The Dodgers. I look forward. To their. Adulation when. I return. To. San Diego.

Sci Fi Machine Mechanical Steampunk Gears Movement Science Fiction

DS: So, you never went to Qualcomm Stadium and booed the Dodgers when they would come to town?

AG: Um. You know. I was a. Kid. I mean robot. You. Just go. Watch. Baseball.

 

Sci Fi Alarm Meltdown Warning Danger Loop Science Fiction

Go to XX1090 to listen to the rest of Darren's excellent interview with Adrian Gonzalez, robot. 

Peter O'Malley, on the record

With MLB owners set to meet this week, Padres fans will be able to definitively claim that their team has owners and they are led by the family O'Malley.

With this scenario a virtual lock I thought I would share with you some thoughts from Peter O'Malley, a primer of sorts as Padres fans transition into an era of unabashed hope:

"I believe salaries are at their peak. It's quite possible some owners will trade away, or even drop entirely, players who expect $200,000 salaries. There is no way clubs can continue to increase salaries to the level some players are talking about."

Huh, wut?

Just kidding. Well I'm not kidding about the quote -- Peter O'Malley did share those words on the record. But he did so in 1971 as President of the Los Angeles Dodgers.

How do I know this? It's written on page 242 of Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Takes a swing at Baseball. True Story. I bought this book for my brother a few years back, a Christmas present perhaps. You place it next to your toilet and you read it while your system regains regularity.

You see, I'm house sitting and taking care of his crazy little dog. In an effort to regulate myself during the AM hours, I took a seat and began to read. The first page I opened to was about Dock Ellis' LSD induced no hitter thrown against the Padres back in 1970. The next page I flipped to was a quote from Peter O'Malley. I'm hesitant to do it, but poor form be damned, here it goes: That Peter O'Malley sure didn't know crap about the future.

Let's hope that the O'Malley group spends in 2012 and beyond and that they do it wisely.

Cuckoo For Nick Canepa: People Chase Headley is not

In Monday's U-T Nick Canepa went on about how the 2012 Dream Team could beat the original Dream Team while simultaneously acknowledging the following:

• Michael Jordan was in his prime.
• Charles Barkley was phenomenal in 1992.
• People "who know the game" say that the best basketball ever played was during the 1992 Dream Team closed session practices.
• The 2012 edition of the Dream Team will get beat this year if it's not careful.

It was brilliant stuff. Let's move on to where he discusses Chase Headley in his hodge-podge-Sez-Me type column in which he never actually says "Sez Me" but certainly means it . . .


Nick Canepa would have us believe the following:

• Chase Headley will be traded.
• The Padres have depth at third base in the minors.
• Fred McGriff was given away in trade back in 1993.
• The columnist hates inter-division trades.
• Chase Headley is not Mike Schmidt.
• If a trade is executed between the rivals then the Padres should receive Magic Johnson.

Let's just see how Canepa wrote it:

Chase Headley is going to be traded. Let's just hope the Padres, who have some minor-league depth at third base, don't give him away (ala Fred McGriff). I hate inter-division trades. If the Dodgers want Headley, who is not Mike Schmidt, they should have to surrender Magic Johnson ...

I don't get Canepa.

Chase Headley, who is not Brooks Robinson, is a good ball player, a solid ball player.

Most fans would be loathe to watch Chase Headley, who is not Tom Cruise jumping on Oprah's couch professing his love for Katie Holmes, don Dodger blue but Canepa is ignoring a very important point.

If you want value for Chase Headley, who is not Angelina Jolie as Lara Croft, then you have to be willing to deal with every club in each league.

This is not the distant past. There will be no fire-sale, the likes of which fans endured in 1993. The current owners need to keep some value on this club so they're not just going to dump Chase Headley, who is not Presidential hopeful Mitt Romney.

Is there depth in the Padres minor league system? Sure. There's James Darnell, who is not Jed Gyorko. And there's Jed Gyorko, who is not Chase Headley (who incidentally is not The Savior or the Anti-Christ).

I just hope that if the Padres do trade Chase Headley, who is not Mercury 7 astronaut Wally Schirra, they get a windfall for him. Alas, I don't know if Chase Headley, who is not Jessica Alba in her prime, is a player who could command some sort of franchise altering wealth of talent to move to San Diego.

But if Chase Headley, who is not George Brett, was Jessica Alba in her prime then we'd be looking at an entirely different reality.

But Chase Headley, who is not Wade Boggs, is Chase Headley. So I guess we'll have to wait until July 31st to find out what becomes of Chase Headley, who is none of the above listed names.

Editor's Note:
No superstar team led by Michael Jordan would lose to the 2012 Dream Team.

The Opening Day Crawl

As we blasted through the doldrums of a February sports calendar and the never ending repetition that is Spring Training we can feasibly reference the odyssey to Opening Day as a crawl. But that's not the type of crawl I'm talking about.

I'm on vacation and I'm setting up a pub crawl to PETCO Park for Opening Day this Thursday afternoon. There will be no t-shirts. I can't guarantee more than three people in attendance. But here's what I will say:

• My two buddies who are meeting-up with me don't know each other. So if you're hesitant to meet because you don't want to feel like a third wheel then throw that care to the wind good man/woman! I've already stated that there are three of us to start so you'll be the FOURTH WHEEL. . . but you'd be like a bitchin' 22 inch rim that totally tricks us out . . . so be there!
• We will keep strict time in each establishment. If you can't start with us then join us along the way.

Let's do it!

If you're inclined to begin the journey on LEG #1 you will go to the . . .

OLD TOWN TRANSIT CENTER: 11:50 AM

My acquaintances and I will arrive at 11:50 for the intended purposes of boarding the MTS trolley for a 12:00 pm departure. The Trolley will drop us off at 5th avenue in downtown at 12:15pm.

What are your needs?

You will need one or two cans of beer. It must be beer that would be frowned upon by the San Diego craft beer community.

Since the Padres are facing off against the Dodgers you should be wearing brown but this is a negotiable point. If you believe in Blue and prefer to snub your nose at our LA neighbors I'm completely down with that. If you are one of those people however, who can't bring themselves to wear even one piece of attire connecting yourself to the San Diego Padres then honestly I don't want you there.

You will also need a firm handshake or fist-bumping capabilities and a desire to be unusually strange. Now that I've scared off the pretenders let us proceed to  . . .

THE LOCAL: 12:30pm-12:49pm (19 minutes)
1065 4th Ave (between C St and Broadway Ave)

We will probably arrive at The Local slightly before this time but the official bar crawl begins at 12:30pm.

This is the perfect place to begin as it's one of those places that proudly claims its San Diego roots. It's a shame we can only stay for Tony Gwynn minutes.

 From The Local we have 5 minutes to scurry over to the . . .

STAR BAR: 12:54pm-1:00pm (6 minutes)
423 E Street (between 4th Ave & 5th Ave)

The Star Bar is a certified dump. It's complete crap. For these reasons we are staying for Steve Garvey minutes.

But why even go at all, you ask? 

As a genuine dive bar it is deserving of acknowledgment. Similarly, former Dodger/Padre Steve Garvey is worth acknowledging because of the historic HR he hit in 1984 at Jack Murphy Stadium against the Cubs.

Steve Garvey is the Star Bar.

SIX MINUTES!

After leaving the Star Bar we continue on a strenuous walk next door to the . . .

GASLAMP TAVERN: 1:01pm-1:36pm (35 minutes)
868 5th Ave (next to Star Bar corner of 5th)

This is the original Gaslamp Tavern -- none of this bowling alley crap like they have over in the East Village.

We'll be here for Randy Jones minutes so Padre folk can get their bearings, order a burger and beer, and maybe talk about Orlando Hudson's groin. I will partake in all three.

After having grabbed a bite to eat and depositing roughly 5 beers into a thinning blood stream we are faced with the sternest challenge of the day -- a three block walk down 5th Ave to . . .

FRED'S: 1:43pm- 2:02pm (19 minutes)
527 5th Ave (between Market and Island)

This next leg of the crawl was supposed to be at my favorite Irish pub, The Field. Unfortunately, word has it that they have an Opening Day related event scheduled and it's all sold out.

Never fear, Fred's is here.

In between drinks of crappy Mexican beer  we can challenge each other with salsa shooters just to see who's more manly/womanly. And stupid.

If you so desire, go ahead and order a quick bite to eat.

But be quick because you only get Gwynn minutes and then we're off to an around the corner spot . . .

TIVOLI: 2:06pm- 2:25pm (19 minutes)
505 6th Ave (corner of 6th and Island)

Here we'll meet at the oldest bar in the Gaslamp, a watering hole where the legendary Wyatt Earp once drank and did other things that lawmen aren't typically supposed to do.

At Tivoli you can purchase opium just like the days of yore or you can settle for a cheap beer in a plastic cup on account of the owner not trusting patrons with glass on game days. With the Dodgers and their "fans" in town, a wise entrepreneurial decision no doubt.

Enjoy your plastic cup full of beer out on the patio for Gwynn minutes and then start pounding concrete to the last public house on the crawl . . .

BUB'S: 2:30pm-3:21pm (51 minutes)
715 J St (between 7th Ave and 8th Ave)

Bub's is perfectly located next to the park so it's a natural last stop. Apparently it is also a "Pittsburgh Steelers fan bar" which makes it perfectly fucked up. But it's not football season so who cares!

Its spacious and has a talented group of young ladies on the tap handles.

 You'll have Hoffy minutes to enjoy before we head over to PETCO Park to take in the pomp and circumstance that is, Opening Day 2012.

PETCO PARK 3:30pm- until LA loses.
19 Tony Gwynn Drive

You can go inside the park or you can camp-out beneath this sign.

If you choose the latter be prepared for the po-po to regulate your transient ass, because honestly, you do look homeless and the city would be best served if you were wallowing in your own piss over on 14th and Island.

I digress.

This is the one day of the year where, as a baseball fan, the only sentiment that exists is one of hope. Sometimes the hope is reinforced but often in San Diego it is crushed.

During those painful times when hope is in question it's always good to have friends by your side. I hope to see you there.

And if not, do enjoy the game.

19 Reasons: The Gwynn Opener and Miserable Giants Fans

The introduction to 19 Reasons can be read here. Here's reason One and reason Two. And Three. And Four. And Five. And Six. Officially, this is Reason Seven.

Opening day in 2011 was awesome. The celebration of baseball's return from a long winter*. But under the advice of Tony Gwynn I chose to also attend the second game of 2011. I dubbed this particular game The Gwynn Opener -- the game attended by fans who aren't consumed by the spectacle that is opening day.

*We don't really have winter in San Diego, relatively speaking. It's more like wummer which is some occasional rain and wind interspersed with beautiful days of sunshine. It's wummer.

Last season's Gwynn Opener was absolutely brutal. Padres fans dissipated after the celebration of Opening Day and I was left to watch the game with a preponderance of drunk-with-championship Giants fans. The Padres also got hammered as Tim Lincecum pitched a gem.

The game was miserable but I have unabashedly included it as one of the 19 reasons that the season was awesome. Why? Because hopefully I've started a tradition of attending both Opening Day and The Gwynn Opener.

What's in store for those who attend The Gwynn Opener in 2012? Purely distilled misery.

This season the Padres get the Dodgers in the opening series and we all know how much Dodgers fans hate Los Angeles and jump at every opportunity to make the sojourn to San Diego.

It is with a fair amount of certainty that I say Padres fans will at least be matched in attendance by our illegitimate Californian brethren form the north. But this game should still be attended, for it is . . . The Gwynn Opener*!

*And if the Padres win the game there's nothing quite like seeing Dodgers fans scurry out of PETCO with their tail between their legs. And, God willing, their knives still sheathed and secure on their person.

Padres Fan Buying Dodgers Gifts Spawns Ideas of GREATNESS

The Tri-tip Christmas shindig last week required the purchase of a gift on my part. The kind soul I drew for the gift exchange is a Dodger fan. I felt that this would make shopping far easier for me than to have drawn a woman on the other side of the family whom I only see once a year.

As I touched the Dodger hat at the sports collectible store I felt like I might burst into flames. This is not hyperbole. I had the uneasiest of feelings. Needle points of bright light permeated my field of vision and I did the only thing I could do in that situation. I grabbed a Padre hat too. It was brown . . .


I left the store with a gift for my father-in-law's Dodger loving brother and a Christmas gift for myself. And I felt more at ease despite the obvious accusations of seasonal selfishness that would eventually follow.

Then I journeyed to one of the last remaining bookstores on this planet we call earth; Barnes and Noble. And I looked for a book on the Dodgers. It was difficult, as once again, heat in my extremities and white light wreaked havoc with my vision. And then once again the pain of a thousand deaths subsided as I chose a book about Branch Rickey, Jackie Robinson, and the Dodgers. If forced to buy Dodger crap then the least I could do was buy the noble kind of Dodger crap, if there is such a thing.

No matter how much we ALL hate the Dodgers, make no mistake about it, they were the trailblazers in setting things right. Were their motivations in signing Jackie Robinson completely altruistic? Likely not. But the fact remains, that while Jackie Robinson was the first African-American in Major League Baseball, it took an organization to be the first to decide to integrate. The Dodgers deserve that honor.

SO LET'S CELEBRATE THE DODGERS THIS YEAR!!!

I've got a GREAT idea. The Padres need a NEW BOBBLEHEAD SERIES . Not a series that celebrates players who won't be with the club next year or young stars who AREN'T young stars. Something sustainable. A bobblehead series for each player with a retired number!!!

You know! Tony Gwynn, Randy Jones, Dave Winfield, Steve Garvey, Trevor Hoffman, and . . . JACKIE ROBINSON!!

Ya see, Jackie Robinson doesn't just belong to the Dodgers. He belongs to ALL of MLB! Every single team received an interest in Jackie Robinson when they decided to retire #42 across the board. SO LET'S GET IN ON THIS, PADRES!

The mock-ups have already been completed! Why should this be the only Jackie Robinson bobblehead we see!!??

 

Let's CELEBRATE JACKIE ROBINSON and THE NUMBER 42! Here's how it goes!

The Padres open the season against the DODGERS of LOS ANGELES on THURSDAY April 5th!!! The series goes from Thursday through Sunday. But we all know that the majority of Padre fans will be there on Thursday for the opener and the Dodgers will just take over the park for the other three games. So the GIVEAWAY has gotta be ON THURSDAY!!!

Celebrating the retired San Diego Padres Jersey numbers, TOM GARFINKEL PRESENTS:

That is glorious! The second greatest Padre of them all! Screw you Dodgers! JACKIE ROBINSON IS OURS!!!!!! 

OPENING DAY 2012!!!

* This post was inspired by my gift purchase and the Dodgers decision to give away a Mike Scioscia bobblehead when the Angels visit Chavez Ravine this year.

* I would like to thank @scottcolson for providing Jackie Robinson awesomeness in brown and gold. Scott is a big believer in Weezer, the San Diego Padres, and belief. Follow him on Twitter!

Acts of barbarism directed towards the Dodgers... I quite enjoy them

As the Padres met the Dodgers in one of spring's last games of meaning, the two squads gathered near home plate to illustrate their dislike for one another. After the Dodgers' Jonathan Broxton had hit Ryan Ludwick with a pitch, Padres' minor league reliever Brad Brach plunked Rafael Furcal an inning later.

Both pitchers say the hit batsmen were unintentional, mere casualties of aggressive pitching. I say who cares! I'm a meat-head and there's little I'd rather view than a good punch-up between the Padres and that cesspool to the north.

Here's to Brad Brach, even if it was unintentional. One day you'll make it to the PENitentiary and when you do, I'm buying the beers.

For those Faithful Eleven who have followed this blog over the years, you may remember that as a youngster one of my favorite players was Don Mattingly. I know, I know, it's disgusting that one of my baseball idols was a Yankee. Hey, at least the Yanks sucked then. What did the Dodgers' new skipper have to say about the near melee? From Don Norcross' UT article:

“I’ll tell you what, I don’t mind our boys stepping up,” said Dodgers first-year manager Don Mattingly. “I don’t mind at all. I really don’t mind the spirit.”

Oh, Donnie Baseball. This is gonna hurt to say it but you can #$  #$&@ $%&^self!


What about Mat Latos, hater of all things San Francisco? How did he react to this Los Angeles brouhaha?

When the players started taking their paces toward each other, Mat Latos was outside on a concourse, signing autographs. After a fan told him what was unfolding, Latos jogged toward the diamond.

Once things cleared, Latos returned to his spot and resumed signing autographs.
“Teammates first,” Latos told fans. “I apologize.”

Don't apologize Mat. This makes my heart warm. You make my heart warm. Let's get this season started.

Trying to remember the 2010 Padres: Game 12 (into the breach)

Come with me to Los Angeles. A fine place to visit when seeking reaffirmation that you indeed have a soul...

For series explanation and previous installments [go here]

GAME 12 of 18
August 3rd, 2010
Padres v. Dodgers @Dodger Stadium
(Tuesday/ Section 158 LG)

WHAT I THINK KNOW I KNOW...

So this is an easy recollection for me because I did a big write-up on it over at RJ's Fro right after the game. I had gone up to Chavez Ravine with the Fro, and despite the Padres loss with Latos on the hill, it was a blast.

Why should you go read it? Because there's a lot of talk about Blue Moon beer and a detailed conversation about the ugliest players ever to wear a uniform. Oh, and a Woody Williams sighting too! And we got lost in a parking lot. It's good stuff. Check it out.

Source: The Seventh Circle of Hell... and a ticket stub.

RESEARCH SAYS...

The Dodgers win 2-1

***
In his first start as a Dodger, deadline acquisition Ted Lilly picks up the win, improving to 4-8. Mat Latos got the loss dropping him to 11-5. Latos pitched really well but was the victim of an anemic offense and some suspect defense.

***
Chris Denorfia threw-out Russell Martin at the plate on a beautiful play. This was good Norf. Bad Norf-- the one who plays an overzealous CF-- over played his hand earlier in the inning when he made an ill-advised dive which led to two runs scoring. It would be all LA needed.

This was a play that Tony Gwynn Jr. would have made and he should have been in a game where runs would have been at a premium. I love Denorfia but he's no center fielder.

Attendance: 38, 866. Place was empty. They showed up late. They left early. This is not a stereotype of  many Dodgers fans.

NOTABLE OMISSIONS...

***
Miguel Tejada hit his first HR as a Padre. A short lived lead.

***
Quotable:

"I didn't help myself by falling behind in the count," Latos said. "I didn't do a good job of attacking hitters."

The walks proved painful for Latos, as Russell Martin lined a pitch to center field that Chris Denorfia couldn't come up with on a diving attempt, and two runs came across.

"It was a slider, he just left it in the middle of the plate. I was just thinking right-center, and it was a good pitch to hit," Martin said. "... It was nice to see it dive and go by him, too. Finally got a break."

See what I mean? Latos good. Denorfia bad.

Watch the entire disaster unfold here.

***
The Padres record falls to 62-43 with the Giants right at their heels (1 GB)

Source: Padres.com (Corey Brock) and Baseball Reference


LASTING IMPRESSIONS...

Road trips for baseball are fantastic and so is Blue Moon on a hot August day. Go to Chavez Ravine but take care not to get lost. Navigating a circle can be surprisingly tricky.

Trying to remember the 2010 Padres: Game 10 (the most memorable of all games)

I went to 18 baseball games in 2010. Two involving the Lake Elsinore Storm and 16 featuring the Padres. My mind ebbs and flows. If only I had a sure fire way of remembering everything...

For series explanation and previous installments [go here]

GAME 10 of 18
July 29th, 2010
Padres v. Dodgers @Petco Park
(Thursday/ Upper Reserved Section 317... but we sat in the Park at the Park)

WHAT I THINK I KNOW...

On July 29th the time had come. Daughter #2 was about to go to her first Padres game while Daughter #1 was getting her second game. For this treat we offered the Los Angeles Dodgers to the baseball gods. Mat Latos was on the hill for the Padres and I think it was that crazy headhunter for Los Angeles.

***
My buddy Al met the Mrs. and I, along with daughters in tow, at the Park at the Park. We picnicked in the shadow of the greatest Padre of them all, taking pictures, running through the grass and watching as much baseball as little ones will permit.

***
The game extended to a precarious length for children accustomed to a structured bed time routine but we pressed on determined to see a regulation 9 innings. We agreed to leave if it went to extras.

***
Something told me that 9 innings was all it would take and if we could just make it we'd be rewarded. I believe it was Oscar Salazar who would eventually knock home the winning run in the bottom of the 9th and it was there at the Park at the Park that we celebrated a walk-off win dancing to the sounds of Macy Gray playing over the PA system.

Source: A child's first game... and a ticket stub.

RESEARCH SAYS...

The Padres won 3-2.

Mat Latos surrendered two runs as did Dodgers' starter Vicente Padilla (aka Headhunter). Latos (5IP) and Padilla (4IP) had unspectacular starts and did not factor into the decision.

The Padres bullpen pitched 4 scoreless innings giving up only 1 hit and striking-out 6 batters. The relief effort featured Joe Thatcher (1IP), Ryan Webb (1IP), Luke Gregerson (1IP), and Heath Bell (1IP).

***
Heath Bell worked a scoreless 9th and was credited with the win, improving to 5-0. Dodgers' reliever George Sherrill recorded only 1 out in the 9th inning getting the loss (1-2).

***

In the ninth inning Scoot Hairston singled and was sacrificed to 2B by a Tony Gwynn Jr. bunt. Oscar Salazar battled George Sherrill in an 8 pitch AB in which Salazar was victorious, driving a game winning single up the middle to plate Hairston.

***
Padres win. So much beauty in the world...

Attendance: 42,075. Sellout.


NOTABLE OMISSIONS...

Game time: 3 hours and 10 minutes

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Throwback Thursday. Brown and Yellow '78s

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Adrian Gonzalez went 2 for 4 lifting his average to .297. Adrian had a notable AB against Dodger reliever Hong Chih Kuo in the 7th inning. I believe that the statistic during this AB was that Kuo, a lefty, had not surrendered a hit to a left handed batter all year... or maybe something ridiculous like the previous 30 ABs. Whatever the exact statistic, the fact remains that Kuo held leftys to an average of .095 in 2010... which is crazy.  Adrian banged Kuo for a single.

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Chase Headley: 1 for 2 with 2BBs. 1 R/1RBI.

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When Oscar Salazar knocked the game winner he was pinch hitting for Everth Cabrera. Salazar's .237 avg. for Cabrera's .199. Makes sense.

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Before the start of this game the Padres acquired SS Miguel Tejada for  minor league pitcher Wynn Pelzer.

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The Padres moved to 60-40, 20 games above .500 for the first time in 2010

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The win pushed them 7 games ahead of the Dodgers and 3 1/2 ahead of the San Francisco Giants.

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Check out this video and sound taken from a fan in attendance... awesome!

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Listen/watch to the audio/video at the Padres link below. Vin Scully gives the call on Salazar's game winning hit.

Source: Baseball Reference and Padres.com

LASTING IMPRESSIONS...

The whole reason I started this series was because I couldn't remember the first game I went to as a kid with my dad. This particular game, during a pennant race and against the rival Dodgers, turned out to be the very first game for the daughter. She won't remember it. But if she ever asks, there are pictures, ticket stubs, video, and this modest piece of writing to document when and where it happened.

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I love walk-off wins. The last three write-ups I've done have all been Padres wins where the winning run was scored in their final AB (1 walk-off and 2 in the 8th).

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Macy Gray's So Much Beauty In The World has grown on me. While I would prefer Pennywise's Bro Hymn, Gray's song has come to signify wins in San Diego. That's always good.

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There are only 8 games left to catalog in my 2010 season and since I've recapped 8 Padres games (2 Storm) it's probably time for a mid-season review. I'll save it for Wednesday.

Me Not Here.... RJ's Fro and AJM Spend an August Evening in LAtrine

I'm a complete whore. I contribute everywhere but here it would appear. Who cares!

Three weeks ago I went to see the Padres play in Chavez Ravine with fellow fans, Rick, Beau, and Marshall of RJ's Fro. It was enchanting.

For a detailed experience of baseball, beer, and raging debate regarding Willie McGee's special place in the game..... (Click here)

The Week In Padres: my internal clock has been destroyed

This is where I write a post about not writing posts.
I made a comment last Sunday about Dick Enberg and his constant love of the enemy and then figured I'd a-keep-on-a-rolling with my commentary as I entered this week. I'd have plenty to say as the plan was to get out to the park on Monday to see the Padres battle the Giants for NL West supremacy. I went to the park.....and my body clock hasn't been the same since....

MONDAY:
I bought a park pass for 5 bucks. When I tried to sneak down to a prime location I was caught by Stan the Usher and sent packing. It was OK. I parked up in the standing room only section positioned behind home plate and chatted with a Giants fan for the rest of the game. I enjoyed telling the fan about Matt Cain's Curse and how they had better win tonight because they had NO CHANCE against Latos on Tuesday night.

Truth be told, it's one of the best seats (errr...standing locations) in the park. Great view (although you can't see the jumbo-tron) of a game. I even had a great view of the yahoos who ran on to the field during the 9th inning.....at which point my week began to unravel. The delay that these clowns caused ensured that I wouldn't be getting home until an unsuitably late hour.....an hour that would be sure to have an adverse affect on my systems' functions for the remainder of the week. Sure enough, while excited about a Padre victory, I woke up pretty tired on Tuesday morning. (click "Read More" to continue)

TUESDAY
Tuesday's game was a disaster. The Padres lost with Latos on the hill.....but the loss was so much worse than that. It was an extra innings loss. Losing in extras is excruciating! So disappointing as we failed to win in regulation (Adams gave up the game tying dong in the 8th) thus setting the stage for another long game. Don't get me wrong......I enjoy extras......but I was tired......I needed to catch-up.

WEDNESDAY
Wednesday's game was awesome in that it was all of the following:

• A win!
• A win by an impressive margin (10-5)!
• A win against the Dodgers!
• A near cycle by Will Venable!

Wednesday's game was an utter nightmare sequence in that it was all of the following:

• A game in which Jon Garland pitched!

Seriously.....for a game that ended in 9 innings it felt like a 3-OT Stanley Cup conference final game. Take Garland's deliberate presence and put it in tandem with an offensive outburst and you have the makings of an eternity. I've been calling Jon Garland "The Mike Hargrove". I think that nickname could just as easily be interchanged with Jon "Extra Innings" Garland. He may not pitch into extras but I sure feel like I've been taken there.

The game ended. I was still tired...

THURSDAY
I was dead to the world on Thursday. The lack of sleep caught up to me and I shattered world records for complete uselessness. I watched a little of the game. I watched all of Lost. I checked the score in the 8th. I went to sleep.

FRIDAY
Right. Disappointed to find there there was no comeback against Kershaw and company and the Padres took a 4-1 loss. Friars still in first. I am well rested.......time to prepare for our HATED inter-league rival. Seattle Mariners on tap this weekend.

Dick Enberg Analysis: How 'bout a little bias, Dick!?!

On Friday night there were some Dick Enberg complaints on Twitter regarding his bias........or lack thereof, to be more exact. The prevailing sentiment was that Enberg gets WAY too excited about play by the opposition and not enough for the Padres. Sure Matt Kemp and Andre Ethier are good. But in giving them praise is it necessary to fawn over them?

Por Ejemplo: 

Casey Blake was chasing a foul pop-up in Friday's 4-3 loss, one that ultimately fell into the stands. As Blake ran out of room he slid to avoid an unnecessary trip into the bleachers. Enberg proceeded to make it sound like Blake had made a play tantamount to the Mays over the shoulder World Series grab combined with an Aaron Rowand face first in to the wall catch......it was neither of those. There was nothing special about Casey Blake's effort especially for a guy who's making $6.25 million/season. Enberg's unctuous praise of Blake led me to Tweet the following:

HaHa. I AM FUNNY.......but that is besides the point! (click "Read More" to continue)


C'mon Dick! If a guy makes a nice play give him a pat on the back. If he's a once in a lifetime talent then share that assessment with your audience. Use your knowledge and experience in the game to make an apropos comparison to a great player of the past. But don't swoon over the guy's play. You are an announcer for the San Diego Padres.....recognize where your bread is buttered!

Which Brings Us To The "Why?"

Websoulsurfer made a good point in one of his Tweets:

Hammer.....meet head of nail. 

Dick Enberg, as a national announcer, must be effusive in his praise of both sides which has made him a very respected announcer over the years. I'd be remiss however, if I did not point out that this is San Diego........not the Nation. Come July, when you're at Wimbledon, feel free to massage the followers/lovers of both Kim Clijsters and Venus Wiliams while they battle and grunt their way to Center Court supremacy........but right now........I am NOT in the mood for MY announcer to be  LOVING the Dodgers.

In Addition
Save the "Touch 'em All!" calls for Padre homers. The call has an inherent excitement to it that should not be shared with the opposition......remember......it's our guy who gave up the dong.

On A Good Note

In last night's loss to LAtrine (4-1) the Channel 4 camera zoomed in  from deep center field and as the shot came closer and closer to the Channel 4 booth someone began to wave their arms. I could not tell who it was. Enberg then quipped (paraphrasing), "Don't do that. I hate the wave!"

As do I, Mr Enberg. As do I.

Props for the use of an orange tie with a white suit. There aren't too many people who can pull that off with such great success.